Finished November 2004 tagging! / Calendar thanks / Masturbation and the inventor of cornflakes
As it turned out, Henry did NOT pick me up today. I assume he's either sick OR he forgot. I'll figure it out tomorrow, as I just told my sister. She thinks I should have called someone to let them know, but I'll figure it out tomorrow. Speaking about tomorrow, 9:15 it is, although she'll call me when she leaves since Jon and Dad have to be at church EARLY for the installation services! She also asked me whether I had a birthday card for Rachel since she'll see her on Monday before she leaves on Tuesday: I told her that I didn't, but I just remembered my spares! The one with thongs will do even if it's a bit scandalous, haha. (maybe I can get Jon to sign too, sometime tomorrow) With this unexpected time off, I was able to finish tagging all the November 2004 RQ posts in only a couple of days, since I finished the October 2004 posts on the 4th. :D (and I'm going through the entries to bulk up the memories!)
Yikes. A certain person just emailed me to thank me for the calendar. Says he wouldn't actually put it in his bathroom, and included weird Google Image Search photos to go along with the email. A bare-bottomed cherub falling asleep on the counter next to a toilet, and a mouse / rat / hamster falling asleep in a plate of nuts... interesting alarm clocks, haha. "As you can tell, I love to sleep"... so does everyone else, dude. Ah well, I'm replying to say I write too much and that'll be it! (see if I talk to HIM tomorrow! :P)
Today's Self-Pleasuring Yet Truly Morbid Fact!
Like many Christian conservatives before and since, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg (of Kellogg's Corn Flakes fame) believed that masturbation, and in fact all sexual excess, was sinful -- "sexual excess" here defined as "sex for anything beyond reproduction." In Plain Facts for Old and Young, he advised that the first line of defense was keeping children busy and constantly under surveillance -- that is, working them daily to the point of exhaustion. The vigilant parent must especially be aware of a child's goings on in the bathtub, on the toilet, or in bed, for solitude was a temptation to vice.
Furthermore, all parents were urged to watch for such tell-tale "symptoms" of masturbation as bad posture (slumped shoulders), a fear of the opposite sex, and hanging out in groups with other children of the same gender. Stiffness in the hips in boys or a wiggly walk in girls were also clues. Also a child who suddenly became more bold -- or worse, more timid -- was surely a masturbator as well.
To stop these hideous acts of depravity, Kellogg strongly advocated circumcision of young boys (note that, up until this era, most non-Jewish American boys were not circumcised), stating that the operation should be done without anesthesia because the remembered pain (and the soreness which followed for several weeks) would serve as a lasting reminder deterring the child from rummaging.
Another deterrent recommended by Kellogg was to wire a boy’s foreskin together at the tip such that any mere erection would become very painful. The wire was of course to be attached by piercing the foreskin with a needle, with the wire following along in place of thread. For the multitude of American males who do not (thanks to Kellogg and his ilk) have a foreskin, it may be worth mentioning that the foreskin is considered to be much more sensitive to pain and pleasure than the bald penis you may currently own.
But Kellogg did not single out only boys for torment -- perish the thought! Girls too must be prevented from self-pleasuring, at all costs. For girls, Kellogg recommended that application of carbolic acid directly to the clitoris. This was "an excellent means of allaying the abnormal excitement, and preventing the recurrence of the practice in those whose will-power has become so weakened that the patient is unable to exercise entire self-control."
Of course, now medical doctors know that carbolic acid is extremely poisonous. When applied to the tissues, and when applied directly to muscle or nerve, it causes instant paralysis. Nonetheless, if carbolic acid did not do the trick, Kellogg reasoned it was necessary to surgically remove the clitoris. He cites one such surgery he performed at the request of the girl's father. Sure that his 10-year-old would go to hell for her sinful indulgence, the father had resolved he would rather take her out in the wilderness and leave her to die rather than have her infect the minds of her siblings with her evil ways. Kellogg and cliterodectomy were her only hope for continued life and salvation. The good doctor happily obliged.
Culled from: Rotten.Com
Generously suggested by: Megan
Of course I had to run out and purchase Plain Facts for Old and Young immediately - and it is, as they say in the midwest, a HOOT! Who would have guessed that simple old Corn Flakes sprang from the mind of someone so deranged? The book is available to read online from the University of Virginia Library. And you can also download it for free as an e-book from the Gutenberg Project:
It's well worth a read!
Steve O. forwards the following:
Three Pedestrians Hit by Car
The scene was all caught on tape. In video from the Fiesta Latina Market, you can see the 30 year-old woman and her two children, ages four and 12, as they were struck by the car while they crossed the street. The driver of the vehicle was identified as Guadalupe Lopez, 79. Investigators said she and her 39-year-old daughter were pulling into the market when she lost control of the car Tuesday morning.
Lopez left the scene of the accident, but turned herself in to authorities a short time later. Sgt. Joe McDonald of the Kern County Sheriff's Department says, "At this time, the investigation has revealed that Guadalupe is unlicensed. We haven't determined why she was driving yet." The mother and her children survived. They were taken by ambulance to area hospitals with fractures and non-life threatening injuries. Lopez is under investigation for leaving the scene of an accident and driving without a license.
Looking at the footage, it's amazing the mother and the children survived!
Jenn has a film recommendation:
"I've got a movie I'd like to recommend for those of us sick enough to stomach it. It's called I'll Bury You Tomorrow, and although it's B-List and full of unattractive and unknown actors / actresses, it's perfect if you're a twisted mind such as myself. Murder, mayhem, blood, guts, and a little necrophilia all make this movie go round. Check it out. :D"
I'll Bury You Tomorrow (2002)