Saturday, May 09, 2009

Southern Fried chicken, moon phases, and being Russian

Bingo of the night:

ADROITEST (350 points) - against Angela H.

High-scoring words of the night:

SATAY (122 points) - against Ursula P. [3W, 4W] {a good deficit-erasing word!}
ADROITEST (350 points) - against Angela H. [bingo, two 5W]

Made some Shake N'Bake Southern Fried chicken earlier tonight, and it was pretty good with the sweet Thai chili sauce! I guess I had time to do that since I'm at HOME instead of being OUT... sigh.

Leslie just took the Could You Be A Soap Star Quiz and is Not A Soap Star. I am Not A Soap Star. You are not cut out for a life of daytime TV and soap stardom. Unfortunately, you don't have any of the skills required. (Probably a good thing...)

Leslie's just got their Russian Name. I just got my Russian Name. It's Valeriya Andreev.

Facebook quizzes from Kaitlin, Kelly, Adam, and Veronica:

Leslie completed the quiz "What Phase of the Moon Are You in?" with the result New Moon. You are in the New Moon phase. Your ideas about yourself and what you desire are just beginning to take form. You may feel uncertain about striking out on your own. Although you desire to be self-sufficient, you also need support from others. This is an excellent time to state your dreams and goals... try getting creative and using photos, magazine pictures, and found poetry to collage a vision board of your heart's desire.

Leslie completed the quiz "What Type of Tattoo Should You Get?" with the result "Sometimes, a few words can say it all" - Script. A picture may speak a thousand words, but there are times in life when a few well-chosen words can say volumes and move mountains. Most texts, beautiful in form and meaning, originate from enlightened minds, so meaning is portrayed in words rather than imagery.

Leslie just took the "What colour should your iPod be?" quiz and the result is Blue. Your results show that you're original and creative. You are obviously somebody with talent and never accepts defeat. Blue is the colour which truly demonstrates your unique nature!

Leslie just took the "If you ruled the world, what would it look like?" quiz and the result is Peaceful. You are the kind of leader that would show us a peaceful solution to ending our wars and stopping poverty. You are a compassionate person, and we would all be better off in the hands of someone like yourself. Everyone would be happy and at peace!

Poo nugget for this weekend: Postpartum Poo - Typically occurring between one and three days after a vaginal delivery (sometimes even longer after a C-section), this bowel movement is a combination of the worst your GI tract has to offer. Several factors contribute to the pain associated with a woman's first bowel movement after childbirth: abdominal muscle fatigue from labor, dehydration, engorged hemorrhoids, and complications from childbirth such as an episiotomy or vaginal tear. While the physiological reality of the postpartum period cannot be changed, several steps may help to make the first few Postpartum Poos more tolerable: increasing water intake to six to eight glasses a day, increasing fiber intake, and taking frequent walks to help kickstart your GI tract's engine. Gentle laxatives and enemas are also frequently needed in the early postpartum period. The most important thing to do is to go early and go often.

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Friday, May 08, 2009

Attracting LOST gangsters with deep fears!

High-scoring word of the day:

MYTHOS (188 points) - against George M. [2W, 5W, hook off VAU for a plural] {a good deficit-erasing word!}

I'm in a DAFFY DUCK VEST mood today - YES! I AM TOTALLY OUT OF CONTROL! Eric called at 6:15 to say that he didn't know if he could pick me up since he was still at work, and had to be at the church early. So I called Jon (at Nathan's), Steph (at the Lougheed Cactus Club), Sam (into Vancouver for a meeting), and Ivan (no answer) - thanks, Eric, thanks. :P

I found this pretentious gem on the vegan Craigslist board today in a post about dreams: "shocking "him." - I called the pig "it" by accident. I'm still working on weeding speciest vernacular out of my speech." I don't have to like pretentious speech like that! Corey's opinion: "So that's a vegan quote at the end? Well, vegans are idiots that try to feel good about themselves by being the most hardcore PC douchebag they can ever dream of being. :P If you want to make them mad, look up some statistics about how many animals farming hurts every year, and explain to them that they support an evil system that kills animals just so they can eat. :P Now it's dinner time, hopefully with plenty of dead animals."

Since I had to watch this a lot last year, I'll see if I get a character that I know... and I did! Haha, nice!

Leslie completed the quiz "Which Young & Restless female lead are you?" with the result Sharon. You are the hopeless romantic who would do anything to get back to your one true love. You truly believe there is only one true soulmate for you... and it helps if his name is Nick!

Facebook quizzes taken from Ryan M., Jennifer J., Gretchen, and Jasmine:

Leslie just took the "What is your deepest, darkest fear?" quiz and the result is You fear being alone. Maybe your mother forgot you in Wal-Mart, or your best friend moved away to Iceland when you were 12. But somewhere along the line, you have learned to fear being alone. You are social by nature, and sometimes the thoughts that sneak into your head when you are by yourself disturb you. You prefer not to think deep thoughts and to live in the moment, but being alone makes that hard to do.

Leslie completed the quiz What character on Lost are you most like? with the result Sayid Jarrah. You are a person with a conflicted past that you try to hide from others. You are strong both physically and mentally, and will do whatever it takes to do what needs to be done. You often struggle with decisions that are between what is right and what is easy, but always end up making the right choice.

Leslie just took the "Do you attract Good Guys or Bad Boys?" quiz and the result is Attract both types. It seems that both males of the good and bad persuasion fancy you. Congratulations. You can have your cake, and eat it too!

Leslie took the Which mathematical function are you? quiz and the result is Riemann Zeta Function: Z(z) - Mystery and wonder are your "prime" delights in life. You seek to apprehend all the hidden, complex patterns in the universe. Some think you are quirky, but they just don't understand you: they have not learned to think outside the box, as you have. You are a misunderstood genius.

You Couldn't and Wouldn't Cheat on Someone

Cheating is totally out of the question for you. There's no way you'd do it.

You take commitment very seriously. You would never go back on your word.

And as far as cheaters go, you don't want anything to do with them.

You believe that people should be trustworthy in all aspects of their lives. Simple as that.

DAMN RIGHT! I don't even want anything to do with people I *suspect* of cheating! *cough*ex*cough*

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Hyperventilation, remote controls, and celebrating successes

These tips are from The Husband Book: A Guy's Guide To Marriage by Harry Harrison Junior, which I plan to give to my brother for his wedding.

Start Here

Develop a sense of humor. Happily married couples laugh most of the time.

Decide who will be in charge of the family finances. And before you decide that it should be you, figure out who has the most discipline / self-control / math skills. Is this really you?

Learn to compromise on the temperature inside your home.

If your wife is in charge of the finances, respect her opinion about what is affordable.

If you're in charge of the money, respect the fact that your wife is entitled to shop / to buy / to enjoy life without an editorial from you.

Don't try to control her moods.

Remember, your actions say as much about your feelings for her as your words do. But women still like to hear the words.

Do not make her your god, nor should you become hers. You are her husband, and to become anything more or less than that will change your marriage for the worse.

Your looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger will be much more important to you than to her.

Don't try to control what she thinks, says, or even does. It's akin to trying to control a forest fire.

Encourage her to have her own group of friends. You can't imagine how important they will be to her.

Buy an electric blanket with dual controls.

Don't keep score.

Remember, the strongest marriages are made up of two independent people who love each other... not two needy people who are dependent upon each other.

Use deodorant.

Remember, she will always be able to sense when you're disturbed. If you've had a lousy day or something went wrong, tell her... or else she'll think you're mad at her.

Don't belittle her ever... not in front of her friends, nor among your friends.

Realize a woman's intrinsic nature is to guard her nest. Anything that threatens that nest will quickly turn her from a peaceful sparrow to an enraged, furious, AK-47-packing kamikaze pilot. The best tip here is to get out of her way.

If she tends to get seasick, your buying a boat will only result in her throwing up in your new boat.

Remember that contrary to what most men think, you will not spontaneously erupt into a period when you have to go to the store alone to buy tampons.

Don't marry her thinking you can change her.

Don't go to bed mad. This can cause fights to last as long as a week. And bad memories to last years.

Don't forget Valentine's Day.

Always let her know how important she is to you, and how much you treasure her.

Let her paint the house the color she likes, even if it's yellow.

Give her the nice car. And wash it for her now and then.

Don't take everything she says in anger personally. In fact, it's best to practice being deaf during these times.

Celebrate her successes, even the smallest ones, and you'll be astonished at how successful she becomes.

Every now and then, give her the remote control. If this results in hyperventilation, try deep breathing.

Talk to her about her dreams as well as yours.

Watch her dumb romantic movies, especially if she watches your dumb violent ones.

Remember, just because she goes to football / baseball / basketball games doesn't necessarily mean she likes them. She may just like being with you.

Don't ever think you know more than she does.

Take her to the ballet.

Take walks with her, even if you hate walks. This is a wonderful time to hear what's on her mind.

Don't get involved in fights between her and her parents. Just listen to her.

Buy her perfume.

Videotape her from day one.

Realize how busy she is, and offer to help.

Refrain from doing or saying anything that would help her self-esteem.

Buy the clothes she says you look good in. If you're not dressing for her, who are you dressing for?

If you don't know where to take her, take her to Hawaii.

Do the laundry sometimes. Just because she usually does it doesn't mean she likes doing it.

Buy her a cellphone.

Treasure your free time with her... like when the two of you are just lying in bed waking up.

Write her love letters, even after twenty-five years.

Remember, a man's greatest failure is usually his failure to listen.

Strive for personal happiness... even when she's not.

Encourage her to reach for the stars.

Hug her. All the time. Especially when you don't feel like hugging her.

Don't try to give her everything. This will only make you feel tired, bitter, and broke.

Make her aware that she's a big part of your success. Because whether you admit it or not, she is.

Never let the romance dim, and the love won't either.

Romance her with a walk in the park. Don't wear headphones.

Smile. Say "thank you." Enjoy every moment.

You will notice that women think all men have ESP, and they'll get upset with you when your powers have deserted you. This is the reason to keep talking to her.

Remember these words: "I think you look great in that."

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Let's pour ash on things! / Bird poop!

High-scoring words of the night so far:

ASHING (192 points) - against Itamar R. [two 4W]
WHIPT (425 points) - against Chelsea H. [two 5W]
ICY (107 points) - against Elyn K. [5W, 2W] {a good deficit-erasing word!}
CANTRIP (470 points) - against Lyn C. [two 5W with one used twice, hook off HOUR to make HOURI] {a good deficit-erasing word!}

This thing restarted AGAIN!

Leslie took the quiz At What Price Would You Sell Out? and the result is Would Sell Out for $13,386,710. And not a penny less!

Leslie took the quiz Which Piercing Are You? and the result is Surface. The dark one... mysterious. You keep to yourself and don't mix well with others, but you don't want to, either. You like to be alone, and don't like to go out clubbing and have fun. That's not a bad thing.

Leslie took the quiz What is your kiss color? and the result is Your Kiss is Pink. For you, kissing is pure happiness... simple as that. You definitely get a little blissed out from kissing, even if you're a bit shy about it. You won't kiss just anyone. Your kisses are special! Young at heart, you still get very excited the first time you kiss someone.

Kissing Type: Generous.

People See Your Kisses as: Sweet.

You Kiss Best With: A Black Kisser.

Stay away from: An Orange Kisser.

Facebook quizzes taken from Jessica G. and Flora:

Leslie just took the "how emotional are you?" quiz and the result is average person. You're in good control of your feelings. Good job.

Leslie took the quiz Personality Test and the result is Shy Personality Type. You keep pretty much to yourself, and mostly open up to those who are really, really close to you. This means your family and best friends, which also means you're really trustworthy and loyal. You tend to be quiet, and sometimes get embarrassed easily.

Leslie took the quiz What Kind Of Eyes Do You Have? and the result is BUTTERFLY EYES.
You have Butterfly Eyes!
Positive Traits: Thoughtful, Intelligent, Humble, Clever, Open-Minded.
Negative Traits: Elitist, Conceited, Apathetic, Cold, Sarcastic.

Leslie just took the "Which Buffy Character Are You?" quiz and the result is Willow Rosenberg. You are Willow! A loyal friend, you are always there to help those close to you when they are in need. You are incredibly intelligent, and love to learn and master new things. You have a good sense of humor, and you find magic to be very intriguing.

Poo nugget for Friday, May 8: Lucky Load - While most agree that getting pooped on by a bird isn't much fun (just ask U.S. President George W. Bush, who got hit during a White House Rose Garden press conference in May 2007), many cultures around the world (including Italian and Indian) regard this mishap as a stroke of good luck.

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Thursday, May 07, 2009

Overtime losses and Andrea hangout time at Blenz

Vancouver lost the game 2-1 in overtime... oh, for two minutes and 44 seconds' sake! (darn Martin Havlat, haha) Andrea called at 8:15 to say that she'd be here soon. Oh good, I'd been just thinking of it, haha. She came by later, and after I got her to sign my guestbook and admire the cute book I got, we talked about mice before heading out to Blenz by the Boston Pizza. We discussed banana loaf, plans, jasmine tea, Elaine, Matt, Shanghai, Chuck, prayer items, challenges, Teresa and her "unique" way of dealing with people / trying to interact with them (no Jeremy jokes about going to the bar twice a day!), Jon and Harmony, Craigslist, Bathroom Readers, looking for places to live / volunteer, Facebook applications, staying up late, community, listening, my old senior volunteer Safeway job, programs, and more. It was good to hang out with her! Got home to find out that this thing restarted, and also that Ryan had left me a message - good, good.

Leslie's just got their Star Trek Name. I just got my Star Trek Name. It's Kahlest, A Klingon.

Leslie just took the Which Reality TV Show Should You Be On Quiz. The show I should be on is The Not-So-Amazing Race. Teams race around Alabama completing challenges.

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I found the perfect shower gift this afternoon!

This afternoon, I went out to buy a replacement Mother's Day card / a parental anniversary card / a bridal shower card for Harmony / maybe a bridal shower gift / Pepsi Max / (black, red, and blue) Sharpies / (Trident Splash orange swirl) gum. All those objectives were ultimately achieved with trips to London Drugs (fruitless), Save-On Foods (they only had Chapman's in 4L containers!), Shoppers Drug Mart (while fielding NOISY people!), Spicy Chicken and Wonton House (for a bowl of Chinese mushroom and vegetable noodles in soup), Hallmark Cards / Carlton Cards (had nothing I wanted), McDonalds (I know, I know - for a hamburger and Sprite), and Coles. I decided to mail Mirage / Eat More / Big Turk (which was STICKY - I had to throw three away at McDonald's for this reason) / Aero / Mars Bars / a blank card to Corey, so also got a bubble-wrap envelope and tape to do that.

At Coles, I bought 1001 Ways to Be Romantic: Now Completely Revised and More Romantic Than Ever (Gregory Godek) and a "prayer" bookmark (for Harmony) and Uncle John's Certified Organic Bathroom Reader (Bathroom Readers' Institute) and a blue dragon bookmark which I had to have (for myself) - PERFECT! I don't want to know about how Jon and Harmony are ROMANTIC in certain aspects, but I thought the book might help anyhow. Besides, people know me for book gifts, AND Steph bought my shower gift for Melia last year anyway. When I called Steph to tell her about it, she said she could make it - a day off - and she seemed to approve of the choice! Also got Ben and Jerry's If I Had 1,000,000 Flavors (Barenaked Ladies) ice cream at Save-On: "a collision of chocolate and vanilla ice creams mixed with chocolate-covered toffee, white chocolate chunks, peanut butter cups, and chocolate-covered almonds" sounds good, even if it IS a dog's breakfast collective! ;)

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Kevin D. added me to Facebook, but I ignored it since it came from some Histrionics Waterfront event that I put a "yes" RSVP to, even though I won't be able to actually attend for geographical reasons. Thanks, Matt H. from Wisconsin!

Facebook quizzes taken from Candy and Ellen:

Leslie completed the quiz "What Led Zeppelin song are you?" with the result Communication Breakdown. Your lifestyle is made up of short jittery bursts of speed.

Leslie completed the quiz "How Blonde Are You?" with the result 25% Blonde. You are a little blonde, but not much. You have a blonde moment every now and then.

Leslie completed the quiz "What Muscle Car should you drive" with the result Pinto or Vega. You were never meant to own a real muscle car. Go back to your little rice burners, and let the real men play!

Leslie completed the quiz "What type of serial killer would I be?" with the result Ax Murderer. All of your hatred and fury is let loose through hacking away at your victims with your twelve-inch, gleaming hatchet. Nothing gets your anger out like chopping away until the remains are in pieces too small to continue. (MUHAHAHAHAHAHA! :D)

Your Butt Says You're Competitive

You are a powerful, assertive person. You are a go-getter in all aspects of your life.

You are not afraid to flirt and show off what you've got. At times, you can be a bit full of yourself.

You are drawn toward close, one-on-one relationships. You crave a partner - romantic or otherwise.

You are friendly and self-assured. You're not one to brag, but you're quite happy with yourself overall.

You tend to be a serious, straight-laced kind of person. It takes you a while to warm up and let loose.

Hahahahaha, WHAT?! This has GOT to be one of THE silliest Blogthings EVER, man... yet I know what certain people would say about my butt. :P

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Garden gnomes, Mr. Right, Scottish names, and more!

Ryan M. (eyeheartnewlife) unexpectedly buzzed me on AIM: he says he remembers that I was so nice to keep him as a friend despite his never being around. Hey, it's what I do for some people, haha. (added each other to Facebook, too!) Also got an Evite for Harmony's bridal shower on May 24 (a Sunday) at 3 PM. I guess I will go, as her almost-sister-in-law, and figure out a PRESENT and a CARD! It's been ages since I've been invited to these things, since my own friends almost all have KIDS now too!

Leslie's just got their Scottish Name. I just got my Scottish Name. It's Dona MacGillivray.

Leslie's just got their Garden Gnome Name. I just got my Garden Gnome Name. It's Jolly MerryFoot.

Leslie completed the quiz What Jolly Rancher Flavor Are You? with the result Watermelon. You are an all-time favorite! You're sweet, sensitive, and caring. You tend to go with the flow, and aim to please. You have a lot of friends because you're nice! You will go far in life because you love interacting with people, and it will be useful when it comes time to get a job or promotion! Just remember that some people will try to take advantage of your sweet nature!

Leslie completed the quiz "What's Your Bible IQ?" with the result Bible Scholar. You really know the Good Book! Good for you!

Leslie completed the quiz "What Random Object Are You?" with the result Fishbowl. A clear sphere, your purpose is to hold something interesting, without being so interesting yourself. However, if you weren't there, another life would go down the toilet... (HA! This one reminded both me and Melissa of that margarita-ish drink I had at The Pickle Barrel in Toronto that time in September 2004, probably because it WAS called the Fishbowl, with 3 oz. of alcohol!)

Facebook quizzes taken from Veronica, Jessica Lai, Cathy, Billie, Morgana, and Becky:

Leslie completed the quiz Where will you meet Mr. Right? with the result Coffee Shop. You are most likely to meet your "Mr. Right" at an upscale coffee shop. Avoid men with a day-old newspaper, and unkempt hair or nails. Also avoid someone who is constantly checking his watch, and men who have their back turned to you. All these indicate a "less than ideal" man. Instead, look for the rugged yet well-groomed man, with stunning eyes who is sipping his coffee while looking out the window, or is relaxing on the comfy leather chair while the sunlight hits his face. Frequent coffee shops in the financial district of a busy downtown city center for the perfect guy. Consider it a bonus if he is holding the coffee with two hands with his wrists visible, and if his feet are turned in your direction. Go ahead, make eye contact and smile... and let the journey begin!

Leslie completed the quiz "Which 80s Glam Metal Band Are You?" with the result Poison. You are Poison.

Leslie took the What Does Jesus Think of You? quiz and the result is Jesus thinks you're a square. You always do the right thing if you can, and you've lived a life that follows the path of the living Christ. Pat yourself on the back! Jesus thinks you're boring.

Leslie just took the "What football player are you?" quiz and the result is Tiki Barber. You're soft-spoken, but you have some serious skills.

Leslie completed the quiz "What kind of good-looking are you? (For Girls)" with the result Cute. People generally like you. You're funny, nice, and outgoing, and you always have a smile on your face. People often say you're beautiful on the inside and out, and you have no problems making friends with anyone. You take the time to enjoy life's moments, and you always look on the bright side. Everything comes easily to you, in every aspect. But, because everything comes so easily, when catastrophe hits, you completely fall apart because you never learned how to deal. Also, a lot of people don't like you simply because they're jealous of you, or because they find your sensitivity and bubbliness annoying rather than endearing. That's okay though, because you don't need those people. Just keep being yourself and everything will be smooth sailing from here.

Leslie took the Your True Patronus quiz and the result is A Dog. You are loyal, lovable, and full of life. You have a great number of friends and rely on them, being close to them. You are quite social, and hard to be angry. You are laid-back and a good friend. You are a leader, but not one that would step out from the crowd.

Leslie took the What's your old lady name? quiz and the result is Ethel You wear pantyhose, tons of gaudy lipstick, and a push-up bra. You embarrass your grandchildren, but you bring the best presents whenever you visit.

Poo nugget for Thursday, May 7: Roughing It in the New World - Colonial Americans wiped their backsides with corncobs.

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Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Pomelos, Shiraz red wine, and being careful in Budapest

Bused over to the townhouse, where my mom thought I should have responded to her email. Eh, I called Jon, who DID tell her despite what she said - that's good enough even if she wasn't home. Mom also said that City Fresh Market was sold out of lobster, so she got prawns instead. It wasn't a huge deal... we got some ice wine and a pomelo that Harmony had brought over at separate times, too. Jon and Harmony were looking things up for their honeymoon on the computer: apparently, they need to be careful in Budapest because of the Gypsies. That reminds me of Kalidrom - I haven't talked to him in years, man. We had baby carrots, pepper, gravy, La Fin Du Monde beer, bok choy, Shiraz red wine from Elaine and Matt's wedding reception, steak, prawns, ice wine, black sesame tofu dessert, and coffee for dinner! Steph was going to go out for dinner, but her friend got called in to work, so she joined us. Jon and I lifted Harmony up, which she didn't seem to appreciate much, heh. Harmony couldn't really lift Jon up, haha. We managed to keep her out of the kitchen most of the night, which was awesome!

We talked about real estate, the hockey / baseball games on TV, documents, Fellowship programs (cultivating small groups / hiking), whether Mom should pack food for Myles and Holly, plans for tomorrow till the weekend or Monday, Vivian S., Mother's Day and Mom's birthday, karaoke, watching tomorrow's hockey game downtown, a card Mom got for the three of us to sign for Grandma on Mother's Day, trying to get Grandma to drink beer, awesome comebacks to hate, and other things. Harmony was a bit confused when I brought up Raymond's singing in fluent Chinese: he is NOT Ray, heh. But I can definitely understand that! Jon joked that PANTIES ON HOOPS could be the musical entertainment at the wedding - Harmony just thought that it would make the occasion memorable for all the WRONG reasons, hahaha!

When I got on the computer to check something briefly, I noted that Erik had invited me to his birthday on Saturday - I'll reply to that later; thank goodness it isn't on Monday since that's the tentative date for Mother's Day / Mom's 61st birthday dinner. (should bring relevant cards on Friday since the four of us might be together again!) Mom gave me a can of diet Pepsi, gave Harmony some stuff, and gave both of us a Ziploc bag of Jelly Flops - yay for Pastor Fulton jokes! (I agree with Harmony that the candy could be very dangerous!) We let Harmony know of the Blue Diamond almond factory / Jelly Belly factory "lunch" where we ate all the samples at the almond place. Steph kindly drove me home, and I let her know about the used condoms at the billiard room - EWWWWWW is right! Teresa's added me to MSN, so that's good. Pretty good night, I would venture!

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Kamloops phone calls, AGAIN!

High-scoring words of the day:

HAIRNETS (206 points) - against Pam B. [3W, 4W]
HEMPSEED (160 points) - against Kay L. [5W, 2W]

I got a weird phone call from Kamloops, and 250-374-5215 looks familiar to me. Good thing I was sleeping, haha! I've found that I no longer remember Lisa's number, which is EXCELLENT!

You Are a Lover

You think that there's no use in fighting, even if you know you're right.

No one wants to hear that they're wrong, so you try your best to compromise.

You have love in your heart for almost everyone. You focus on what you do have in common with people.

Life is so much nicer when everyone gets along. For you, that harmony is the most important thing.

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Feelings and football are mutually exclusive!

These tips are from The Husband Book: A Guy's Guide To Marriage by Harry Harrison Junior, which I plan to give to my brother for his wedding.

Start Here

Don't talk about your old girlfriends. It would be best not to invite them to the wedding, either.

Don't assume when you are married, things stay the same as when you were dating. Things change from the moment you say, "I do."

Agree from the beginning to never lie to each other.

Remember these words: "Your hair looks great."

Don't expect lifelong bliss, free from problems / quarrels / issues. You're guaranteed to be disappointed.

Realize from the beginning that love is a decision.

Don't be surprised when the woman who wants satin lingerie in her twenties wants cotton flannel PJs in her forties.

Remember no matter how much you love her, a wife cannot be your complete source of happiness or sorrow. Or else you will have nothing but sorrow.

Keep in mind that the two greatest obstacles to your happiness will be romance and finance.

Don't think that just because you're married, you have to do EVERYTHING together. In fact, it's important that you don't do everything together.

Remember, you're going to spend the next fifty or so years in conversation with her, interrupted by life.

Don't make the mistake of picking out your first apartment without her. In fact, don't make the mistake of making any major decisions without her.

Don't ever come between her and her hairdresser. Unless she comes home after spending $200, and looks no different.

Start praying from your first night of marriage together. As a couple.

Show her respect at all times. Even when you're furious with her.

Shower often.

Let her find a scented candle burning when she gets up in the morning. It sets the tone for the day.

For some reason, she'll think the pair of shoes that are the most uncomfortable look the best on her. Help her work through this.

Don't fantasize about other women. This falls into the "stupid" category.

Don't compare her to other women, mentally, verbally, now, or ever. This falls into the "I'm looking for a fight" category.

She will want you to read her mind. You will fail more often than not. Just accept this and move on.

She will want to talk about feelings. You will want to talk about football. Here's a perfect chance to learn the art of compromise.

Tell her that you love her more than you think you need to. Like four or five times a day. Incredibly, she will hear you MAYBE once a day, but that will be enough.

Take her shopping often, and buy her outfits she would never buy herself.

Don't fall into the trap of thinking you'll be happy if only she'll be happy.

If and when she has a fight with her mother, do not take sides. In fact, go outside.

Send her flowers. With a truly sappy card. For some reason, women love this.

Talk about your plans and dreams with her. Listen to hers.

Flirt with her continually. Remember, that's how all this got started.

Realize you're not marrying a cook or a maid or a fantasy, but a woman with her own dreams and fears and expectations.

Start saving money.

If you don't know what to buy her, buy her jewelry.

Work on yourself.

Try as you might, you won't be able to buy her happiness. So have a plan B.

Wait to have children. They deserve to have stable parents who've worked the kinks out.

While you're young, travel all you can. Because when you're older, there'll be kids, obligations, and (let's face it) a lingering desire to catch up on your sleep.

Don't criticize her in front of others. This can have far-reaching consequences.

Don't try to change her.

Before you buy her chocolate, find out if she's allergic to it.

If a couple can successfully share one bathroom, one sink, one tub, and one shower, the odds are good they'll stay married.

Don't let her parents or your parents buy you too much. Gifts usually come with strings.

Get to know her mom, and send her flowers every now and then. (huge number of brownie points)

Remember, she married you to be with you. Not to get cellphone calls from the duck blind.

Buy her a diamond. Even if you have to wait twenty years to do so.

Let her buy you cologne.

Remember a lot of men are incapable of filling out forms. Let her.

If you have to introduce her to the world of sports, explain the rules. Many women find football as difficult to understand as men do La Bohème.

Be able to live without her. This way, you can love her without owning her.

Don't forget: She will never understand your fascination for bodily noises. Never.

Remember, you don't own her. She's your wife, not your possession. She's entitled to her own opinions, her own beliefs, even her own mistakes.

Don't make fun of her.

Accept the fact that she may not like all your friends. In fact, if she likes only one or two, consider yourself lucky.

Don't walk in front of her.

Help her chase her dreams. This could be going back to college, starting a company, or writing a book.

As often as you can, make her feel adored.

Remember, many women are not huge fans of Sylvester Stallone movies. Strange, but true.

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There's a hobbling triad with a lid, people!

High-scoring words of the night so far:

HOBBLES (239 points) - against Leah D. [2W, 5W, hook off QI and PIS to make PE and QIS]
PAGER (233 points) - against Angelique G. [two 5W]
OPENEST (3226 points) - against Shelley R.-B. [2W, two 4W, two 3W]

Interesting rack of the night so far: LIDTRIAD (against Angelique G. - read that as "lid triad")

I also played QIS off my own QIS in a game with Leah D. - yay for quirky coincidences!

Apparently, Harmony's coming to the townhouse for a steak and lobster dinner tomorrow night.

Facebook quiz taken from Gabriel:

Leslie completed the quiz "What Office character are you?" with the result Jim Halpert. You are Jim. You are a down-to-earth person with a great sense of humor, usually at someone else's expense. You are a normal person who everyone likes!

Poo nugget for Wednesday, May 6: Dr. Stool Says - Diverticulitis - This is an inflammatory condition that affects individuals who have diverticula, or small outpouchings in the colon wall. The list of famous people who have suffered from this disease includes Desi Arnaz (I Love Lucy), John Wooden (UCLA basketball coach), US President James K. Polk, Amitabh Bachchan (Bollywood film star), and Craig Venter, the man who mapped the human genome.

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Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Ten Most Interesting, Strangest Mental Disorders

DAMMIT! This thing restarted when I was in the middle of a lot of typing! UGH!


1. Alien hand syndrome (Dr. Strangelove syndrome)

Alien hand syndrome is a neurological disorder in which one of the sufferer's hands seems to take on a life of its own. Sometimes the sufferer will not be aware of what the hand is doing until it is brought to his or her attention. Alien hands can perform complex acts such as undoing buttons or removing clothing.

2. Foreign accent syndrome

The syndrome causes people to speak their native language as if they had a foreign accent; for example, an American native speaker might speak with a French-sounding accent. It usually follows a severe brain injury, such as a stroke.

3. Capgras' syndrome

The Capgras delusion or Capgras' syndrome is a rare disorder in which a person holds a delusional belief that an acquaintance, usually a close family member or spouse, has been replaced by an identical looking imposter.

4. Fear of the number 13 (Triskaidekaphobia)

Adolf Hitler was triskaidekaphobic. A specific fear of Friday the 13th is called paraskavedekatriaphobia or friggatriskaidekaphobia. Tetraphobia is the fear of the number 4 in China, Japan, and Korea.

5. Working out too much (Bigorexia)

Bigorexia or Muscle dysmorphia is a disorder in which an individual becomes obsessed that they are not muscular enough. Sometimes referred to as bigorexia or reverse anorexia nervosa, it is a very specific case of body dysmorphic disorder (BDD). Muscle dysmorphia can cause individuals to constantly check themselves in a mirror, become distressed if a gym session is missed, take potentially dangerous drugs (e.g. anabolic steroids), and neglect jobs / relationships / family due to exercising

6. Collecting too many books (Bibliomania)

Bibliomania is an obsessive-compulsive disorder involving the collecting of books to the point where social relations or health are damaged. The purchase of multiple copies of the same book and edition, and the accumulation of books beyond possible capacity of use or enjoyment are frequent symptoms of bibliomania.

7. Exploding head syndrome

It causes the sufferer to occasionally experience a tremendously loud noise as if from within his or her own head, usually described as an explosion or a roar. This usually occurs within an hour or two of falling asleep, but is not the result of a dream.

8. Trichotillomania

Trichotillomania is an impulse control disorder characterised by the repeated urge to pull out scalp hair, eyelashes, beard hair, nose hair, pubic hair, eyebrows, or other body hair. It may be distantly related to obsessive-compulsive disorder, with which it shares both similarities and differences. (I have this, unfortunately...)

9. Fear of men (Androphobia)

Androphobia is an abnormal and persistent fear of men. Sufferers of this disorder experience anxiety even though they realize that men may face no real threat. Androphobia is one of infinite possible phobias, and as such can be traced back to a specific triggering event, usually a traumatic experience at an early age.

10. Faking illnesses to gain attention (Munchausen syndrome)

In Munchausen syndrome, the sufferer feigns, exaggerates, or creates symptoms of illnesses in himself or herself in order to gain attention, sympathy, and comfort from medical personnel. The role of "patient" is a familiar and comforting one, and it fills a psychological need in people with Munchausen's.

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Men, Beatles, Greek goddesses, and more!

I had a dream where my friends and I were trying to sort out these receipts. They were all on white paper in purple type, and they were all the same size: very thin! This made it hard to sort, but Raymond decided to take a break to be on the computer for a bit. He challenged Jeremy to play a MARIO-like game which featured castles and princesses, so the guys did that for a while until I decided that I wanted the computer. They willingly gave it up for me (unlike someone else I could name), and Raymond decided to wish his friends a happy September birthday on Facebook without using the computer. (I was happy because that meant me and Eric, haha) Apparently, this involved putting a bunch of papers together, then pressing a big orange TABOO button a few times. Jeremy later said he'd found someone's Bible with weird stories in it: like the one where "Lily" (who looked like a cartoon) was blasted into space, and where the Psalms were all in prose form instead of poetry. Interesting dream...

Now Candy wants me to add her sister Leona on Facebook; she's the one between her and Ducky (Subena), and has tried to do the Our Place thing. Meh, I'll add Carol B. while I'm at it, I suppose.

Facebook quizzes taken from Jennifer J., Morgana, and Michael M.:

Leslie completed the quiz "How Well do you know Men?" with the result Excellent!! (100%). Fantastic!! You really do know men pretty Well!! Either you're a master at what men really want, or you've blatantly cheated! Or you might just be a man trying to find out if this quiz is authentic enough! Whatever it is, congratulations! You're an Expert on that pathetic species called "Man." (I got 100% on the "women knowledge" quiz, too. Guess I do have insight into people... or maybe just some of the stereotypes, haha.)

Leslie completed the quiz "Which Beatles song are you?" with the result Hey Jude. You're Hey Jude. You're all about making life a bit more brighter, no matter what has happened before. Unfortunately, you're a hopeless romantic, and most of your time is spent getting over loved ones. When your life is a trainwreck, your friends cheer you up, help you see the brighter side, and help you to get back on your feet and back into the game. "Hey Jude, don't make it bad / Take a sad song, and make it better. / Remember to let her into your heart / Then you can start to make it better."

Leslie completed the quiz "What Greek God(dess) are you?" with the result Artemis. You are Artemis and enjoy being alone. You like the search, to hunt for those things you desire and you are like wild animals such as deer. You are especially active at night, restless and roaming through your territory. The moon lights your way.

Leslie completed the quiz "What Marvel hero or villain are you?" with the result Wolverine. You're an animal and a man that can carry a kitten through a burning building while slicing people in half and wanting to have a beer right after. You play well with others as long as they aren't too full of themselves. You're going to live forever.

Leslie completed the quiz "What was your nationality in your past life?" with the result You were Spanish. In your past life, you were Spanish.

Leslie took the Which Tree did Your Birthdate fall? quiz. Your tree is Lime: The Doubt. Personality: Accepts what life dishes out in a composed way, hates fighting, stress and labor, tends to laziness and idleness, soft and relenting, makes sacrifices for friends, many talents but not tenacious enough to make them blossom, often wailing and complaining, very jealous, loyal.

Leslie just took the Secret Behind Your Name!

L: Love is something you deeply believe in.
E: You are a very exciting person.
S: You are very broad-minded.
L: Love is something you deeply believe in.
I: You are always smiling and making others smile.
E: You are a very exciting person.

C: You definitely have a partier side in you... don't be shy to show it.
H: You are not judgmental.
I: You are always smiling and making others smile.
- :
W: You like your privacy.
A: You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.
H: You are not judgmental.

N: You like to work, but you always want a break.
G: You have excellent ways of viewing people.

Leslie just took the "What type of person are you?" quiz and the result is You are a Dreamer. You spend your time fantasizing and wondering what could change for the better. Your mind is a portal to a new world that inspires and motivates you to make it real. You keep the world thinking of new possibilities and have everyone around you do the same.

Leslie just took the "What is Your Superpower?" quiz and the result is Super Speed. Your speed surpasses that of a normal human being, and you can run to top speeds that could even break the sound barrier.

You Need Friends to Be Happy

You are a friendly, social person. You seek out connections and relationships.

Being close to others is very important to you, and you don't like discord.

You feel great when you're cooperating and working with others. You enjoy belonging to a group.

Nothing makes you feel worse than feeling alone or alienated. You want to be liked by those around you.

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May the 4th be with you! / Cinco de Mayo!

Bingo of the night:

ITINERANT (220 points) - against Chris F.

High-scoring words of the night:

NOVICES (112 points) - against Chelsea H. [4W, 2W]
MARAUD (320 points) - against Nancy L. [2W, two 4W]
ITINERANT (220 points; two 4W, bingo), GAWK (140 points; 2W, 5W) - against Chris F.

Hahaha, Wendy S. just wondered if our Wordscraper game would ever end. For that, I plan to play one tile at a time until it DOES finish... muhahahaha! It's not as bad as it sounds, as there are fewer than seven tiles left for me!

Andrea called; she had wonton noodles with Chuck, and I thought that was good. Rain calls for comfort food, for sure. I don't mind getting together after dinner and her class on Thursday AT ALL! Yay for friends!

Leslie's just got their Mexican Name. I just got my Mexican Name. It's Christina Ramirez.

Leslie's just got their Star Wars Name. I just got my Star Wars Name. It's Ponda Baba, Aqualish mercenary.

Facebook quizzes taken from Morgana, Gabriel, Hilary, Darren, Kaitlin, Spoz, and Gretchen:

Leslie just took the "Which Pirates of the Caribbean character are you?" quiz and the result is Hector Barbossa. Brutal, commanding, disagreeable, aggressive, and yet a gentleman nonetheless (however contradictory that may sound). You are all for teamwork, providing you are in charge of the working team. You take orders from no one (though you may listen to suggestions), and are at home anytime you are yelling orders at a group of people. Stubborn and persistent, you fight for what you believe in. But if things don't go your way, you are apt to either give up or go nuts. Speaking is one of your talents, and you enjoy making people listen to your many monologues. You refuse to put up with nonsense from people you deem lesser than you (meaning pretty much everyone), and have a very limited amount of patience. You tend to be violent, but not ruthlessly so. For all your bullying ways, you are not without mercy. You also have an unusual soft spot for fuzzy animal companions, and often spend time enjoying all the simple human pleasures that life – and heaps of stolen wealth - have to offer.

Leslie completed the quiz "What stereotype do you fit?" with the result Art Freak / Hipster. You're incredibly unique, and love anything to do with art. This can be music, writing, painting, photography, or sculpting. You are often friends with stoners, but may not smoke up yourself. You're often quiet and have really weird mannerisms, but have a very eccentric personality. You love any form of art, and have an eye for beauty in things considered plain. You take pride in your unique sense of style and fashion.

Leslie completed the quiz The ULTIMATE "How good is your Cantonese?" Quiz! with the result (CMI in Canto) Ngei gor gong dong wah zhan hai mm dak la. (your Cantonese really cannot la) Your ability to understand Cantonese is quite poor. You may know what char siu bao is, but you can't understand phrases and sentences in Cantonese. Brush up your skills by talking to people who know Canto, and watch more Hong Kong dramas in Cantonese!

Leslie completed the quiz "Which Peanuts Character Are You?" with the result Charlie Brown. You are Charlie Brown. You might be a big blockhead, but you're the best friend someone could ever have.

Leslie took the What Pokemon from the original 151 are you? quiz and the result is Charizard. You are always angered or mad at something. You are fueled by evil. Your rage takes you over most of the time in which you take it out on anyone. You my friend, are one very mad person. (Hey, one I've actually heard of! Not bad... except for the result content, of course. :P)

Leslie just took the "Which Sailor Moon Character Are You?" quiz and the result is You are Sailor Moon! Otherwise known as Usagi Tsukino (English name is Serena). Although you can be lazy, annoying, and irresponsible, your intentions are always good. You're always thinking of others first. You have a bubbly personality and a great sense of humor.

Leslie took the Rorschach Test quiz and the result is Creative. You have quite an imagination. You see these as more than inkblots, but nothing sinister either. You see dragons and aliens, not killers and bloodstains. (I had to pick the dragon answers, man... :D)

Leslie just took the "Angel Or Devil" quiz and the result is YOU ARE LIKE HALF! You're bad in ways, but at the same time, you're good.

Poo nugget for Tuesday, May 5: Breast Feeding vs. Bottles - One important, yet often overlooked, aspect of the debate about whether to breastfeed or bottle-feed your child concerns the issue of poo. Put simply, the poo of a breastfed baby can be a thing of beauty. Classically described as yellow and "seedy" in consistency, this poo is adored by parents for its sweet aroma. Given the similarities, this poo is often mistaken for fine Dijon mustard.

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Monday, May 04, 2009

Car bombs, the Witness Protection Program, and the mosque!

Quick summary of the last few episodes: Tony pulled off the biggest and most shocking heel turn since Andre the Giant ripped Hulk Hogan's crucifix off his neck on an episode of Piper's Pit. Kim came back and reconciled with her father, though she didn't put up much of a fight when he insisted on dying, even though she could have saved him with her stem cells. Larry bit the dust (although he did NOT receive the silent clock - hmm...), and Renee pretty much confirmed what we all suspected: the two of them had done the horizontal mambo at some point.

Olivia Taylor (who looks like she could pass for Reese Witherspoon's stunt double - you know, if Reese Witherspoon did action films) was really upset about her mother's deal with Jonas Hodges, and she decided to take matters into her own hands. And there's some group of conspirators who only communicate via chatroom ("#EvilCabalOfMercenaries" on IRC), although we know one of them was the guy who played Coach Yoast in Remember the Titans. Evidently, he was VERY upset about his demotion in favor of Denzel Washington's character. He convinces the others to follow Tony's and his new girlfriend's (who doesn't hold a candle to Michelle, by the way) plan to use their lone remaining canister to attack immediately.

This week's episode of 24:

Tony and his friends are inside Jibraan Al-Zarian's apartment. Cara is working on planting evidence on Jibraan's computer while Tony threatens him and tells him to cooperate. He gingerly removes the piece of duct tape from Jibraan's mouth, which is good because his mustache and beard could have made that really painful. See? Tony would understand. He's got the evil beard thing going for him. Tony then gives Jibraan some lines to memorize for his anti-America propaganda video. Janis continues to give Jack attitude and accuses him of being a racist. Well, considering that Jonas told Jack that they were going to use Muslim extremists, then it kind of makes sense, right? I mean, if they were looking at right-wing militia groups, then they'd just be wasting everyone's time, don't you think?

Sure enough, Jack lays the verbal smackdown on Janis and puts her in her place. Considering Janeane Garofalo's politics, I wonder if they wrote her character like that on purpose. Chloe realizes Jack is dying, and she becomes genuinely emotional. Jack tells her to stay strong, and tries his hardest not to break down in front of her. Chloe agrees to go back to work, and Jack looks sad after she leaves. This was actually a touching and a very well-acted scene. Kudos to both actors. By the way, how much do you want to bet that it's Chloe that calls up Kim and shames her for not insisting on helping her dad?

Jibraan is shooting his anti-America video (not bad, he memorized his lines in less than 10 minutes), but the cops show up. Obviously, Tony tells Jibraan to get rid of the cops, or else. Jibraan looks clearly distraught when he tells them that his now-gone friends were making a lot of noise, but the cops take him at his word. They don't ask to come in, nor do they do much else except to tell him to keep it down. Good to see the cops in D.C. are lazy. Chloe finds out about Jibraan, and Jack decides to track down his Imam. Renee then asks Jack if he is capable of being in the field, but Jack says he needs to see this through. Renee gives him a sad look before giving her assent. Aaron ushers in some unsavory-looking fellow who is supposed to help Olivia kill Hodges. The guy who plays him was a doctor on ER and a snitch on NYPD Blue. Nice resumé. Anyway, Olivia wants Hodges dead, she wants his family dead, and she wants his house burned to the ground. Okay, maybe just the first thing.

Hodges meets with the U.S. Marshall who will be taking him into Witness Protection. His new name is "Robert Tippett," and Hodges is less than thrilled about it. It could be worse. It could be "Oliver Clothesov" or "Mike Rotch." I was hoping they'd go with "Richard Croft," "Bud Kilmer," or "Luke Martin" in a nod to some of Jon Voight's greatest roles. Anyway, Hodges thinks the agent is giving him attitude and Hodges gives him a lecture about everything that he's lost. Like when he threw his best friend over a guardrail, and was more worried about cleaning the blood off his shirt. That cracked me up. Jack and Renee arrive at the mosque, and the first thing Jack does is pull out his gun. This is not going to end well for the Imam... The Imam gives Renee attitude, and Jack then gets in his face. Janis calls and tells Renee that a police officer has responded to the APB. Jack then drags the Imam with them because he doesn't want him to tip Jibraan off. I give the Imam a 30% chance of living. I guess religious figures can be redshirts, too.

Jibraan has to convince his brother that he's really a terrorist. His brother buys it hook, line, and sinker, and actually spits in Jibraan's face. I guess he didn't know Jibraan as well as he thought he did. Olivia gets the account information from the hitman and she's prepared to transfer $250K into his offshore account. $250K? That's pretty cheap, don't you think? Especially for a high-value target in federal custody like Hodges. Where did she find the deal? "You can name your price on everything from airline tickets to hotels to hitmen!" Olivia decides not to go through with it, and doesn't transfer the money. I'm sure that's not going to backfire on her. Chloe discovers that the money and the evidence on Jibraan's computer were backdated. Man, Cara is not a good planter-of-evidence, is she? Jack realizes that Jibraan was being set up, and he apologizes to the Imam. The Imam and Jack have a heart-to-heart, and the Imam tries to get Jack to convert. Yeah, that's likely. He'll come back next season as Mustafa Asad.

Hodges stares at photos of his family and his daughter in the picture looks nothing like Angelina Jolie. He doesn't respond when the Marshall calls him by his new name. Luckily, Hodges responds before the Marshall has to take a page from The Simpsons, by saying "When I say: 'Hello, Mr. Tippett' and press down on your foot... smile and nod, okay?" Of course, Hodges' car then blows up and it looks like Olivia couldn't stop the hit in time. Then again, we don't know who actually had him killed, just yet. Plus, there's no silent clock for Hodges, so he might not even be dead... Olivia freaks out when she finds out about Hodges. She calls her contact and he tells her not to talk on the phone. Yeah, Olivia... you know calls out of the White House are all recorded. Anyway, he wants to meet up, and she agrees. She then composes herself and walks calmly past Aaron, who looks like he knows something is up. She better not get Aaron killed, that's all I got to say.

Jack's logic once again rears its head. He tells Renee that Tony and his men are clearly using the brother as leverage because that's what he would do. The Imam then finds about Jack's condition, and he starts to sympathize. Like that 70s Senator and Larry Moss, he's now Jack's buddy, apparently. Well, we know what happened to those two. Jack and the team break in and try to subdue the hostile. In the confusion, the brother breaks off a piece of glass from the mirror and tries to kill the hostile. Great move, dumbass. Now they won't be able to get the guy to talk if he bleeds out. Maybe the brother was in on it all along? Man, I've been watching too much of this show. Tony and Jibraan enter a van, and it looks like they're targeting the Metro. All you early commuters are in for a rude awakening. See? It pays to be late to work.

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Don't store used napkins in your bag, Grandma!

Dad picked me up a little later than he said he would, and thought that I'd been wasting my time on the Internet. Maybe, but I also was trying to do some catchup from yesterday! Let him think that I was re-reading the ANNE OF GREEN GABLES series, which I did do at some point. Read the newspaper when I got to the townhouse: that swine flu might be a pandemic, according to WHO. Dad picked Grandma up from Mah-Jonng, then we left a while later. Grandma insisted that I drink strawberry Boost... I told her that storing used napkins in her knitting bag wasn't a good thing, but she insisted that she was going to dump it anyhow. We picked up Harmony: when Dad saw Peter at the open door of the house, he told me that he was Holly's husband. Obviously, I already knew that, having met him on multiple occasions!

Discussed Holly teaching piano, Mom being late because of work, whether Jon would be at Chen's on time (he was), and other things with Harmony. She said she'd hang out with people again like she did last night: sounds good! We got to the restaurant and ordered a bunch of food: Jon said that he needed to research Prague and Vienna, and Harmony brought up Budapest. When Mom got there, she expressed concern that Myles wouldn't be eating, and asked whether she should have invited him too. Harmony said that he and Brit (his girlfriend) OR Peter were probably eating A&W, heh.

Talked about Jeremy's tea, finance, Martin, Raymond working at the bank and not for the government, ballet, the SLB extravaganzas / tallies and how much Tony could eat, Teresa, playing piano for kids, Jon being a social butterfly (he knew people at the restaurant), etc. When Jon and Harmony took me home, I insisted that she take the Chapman's tub (and some Big Turk bars) even though she politely refused. Got home to find that Steve B. had added me to Facebook - ah, the guy from Our Place. I'm on it!

Poo nugget for Monday, May 4: Toilet Modifications - In the U.S., the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) requires that restrooms constructed for public use be accessible to the disabled. Common modifications include lower sinks, grab bars, and extra room for maneuvering a wheelchair.

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Chapman's 4L tub is STUPID!

Okay, maybe I should have returned the 4L of Chapman's butterscotch ripple ice cream on Friday afternoon too. Now it turns out that I can't open the tub / plastic container! I also found that a Big Turk bar had somehow oozed out on the dining room table, but the others seemed to be okay - still unpleasant.

Leslie's just got their German Name. I just got my German Name. It's Raina von Winkel.

Leslie just took the Which Nintendo Character Are You Quiz and is Kirby. I am Kirby. A little odd, but certainly charismatic. You tend to look after yourself, but you do a very good job of it.

Leslie took the What will your daughter be named? quiz and the result is Bridget. Meaning: Its source is Brigit, a Gaelic name meaning "Exalted one." ("You will answer inane questions that have to do with your hair / eye color, and I will divine the name of your future child!" I don't get it. Bridget is a good Irish name, but it's not my heritage, really. [although I have an extended relative called Brigitte...])

Facebook quizzes taken from Kathy T., Jessica G., David W., Kelly, and Golden:

Leslie completed the quiz "Pregnancy Test" with the result You are not pregnant! Despite all the rumors and any positive pee sticks, you are definitely not pregnant. You now have plenty of time for one more horseback ride before trying again. Stay safe out there!

Leslie completed the quiz "Which active NBA player are you?" with the result Kobe Bryant. You're smooth, you're not afraid to take shots, and you take the final shot. Hit or miss, no regret. You will score whatever the opposing team defense set up against you. You've got the heart of a lion, you are godlike, you are Kobe Bryant!

Leslie completed the quiz "How Well do you know Women??" with the result Excellent!! (100%). You've Got to be Kidding Me!! Either you're an expert on the field of Women, or you've cheated!! Or else, you might just be a woman who has taken the quiz to see if it's really authentic! Whatever it is, Congratulations.... You're an Expert on the most difficult topic on earth.... Women!!

Leslie took the How Gay Are You quiz and the result is STRAIGHT. You're not gay in the slightest. Well done. :D

Leslie completed the quiz "Full Personality Evaluation" with the result You are a type 1C person. You have a need for other people to like and admire you, and yet you tend to be critical of yourself. While you have some personality weaknesses, you are generally able to compensate for them. You have considerable unused capacity that you have not turned to your advantage. Disciplined and self-controlled on the outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure on the inside. At times, you have serious doubts as to whether you have made the right decision or done the right thing. You prefer a certain amount of change and variety, and become dissatisfied when hemmed in by restrictions and limitations. You also pride yourself as an independent thinker, and do not accept others' statements without satisfactory proof. But you have found it unwise to be too frank in revealing yourself to others. At times, you are extroverted / affable / sociable, while at other times, you are introverted / wary / reserved. Some of your aspirations tend to be rather unrealistic.

Leslie completed the quiz "What Marvel superhero are you?" with the result Jean Grey. Nothing is scarier to men than a woman who knows what you're thinking, all the time. Couple that with the ability to throw a guy off a cliff with your mind for having a stray thought, and you have one bad babe! You have been to the dark side and back, and seen more than most would care to. Keep your chin up, and you'll keep on being one of the strongest women out there!

You Are the Library

You are very intellectual and well-read. You tend to be absorbed in your own interests.

You can seem a bit standoffish. To be honest, you're not that interested in other people.

You are comforted by the things you own. You tend to be a pack rat.

It's likely that you have many old possessions that you treasure. You rarely throw anything away.

HAHAHAHA! I love this result! :D

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Sunday, May 03, 2009

Kids and swine flu / EWWWW! Who leaves used condoms around?!

Once I got to church this morning, I wondered why nobody was around yet, and then I remembered that I was there early. Saw Jon and Harmony shortly after, and welcomed her back home. Cindy, Dianne, Phil, and Grace saw us later, and Ivan jumped in front of her. I sat with Harmony, and greeted Raymond later. People welcomed Harmony back, and some people did introduce themselves to her: Martin, Randal, and others. I greeted Christon, Annie, Mei Lin (Julie's coming back soon!), and others. Everyone laughed when Pastor John said that the flower on the pulpit was to commemorate a birth in the Chinese congregation, but they didn't know who the mother was! We also saw a woman wearing a mask, so a few of us discussed it a bit. After service, I gave Jen her birthday card and gift of two Toblerone bars, then explained why some of us couldn't make it to her party tonight: she called me sweet, and said that her mom's going to Tibet! Then I gave Brian his birthday card: he hugged me, and said that I always remembered - you bet!

Went to the fellowship hall, and found that the food (cheese buns / apple slices / cookies) was outside in the courtyard. Hannah thanked me for the gift, and said the book was good - Hien asked if I'd made a dent in my ice cream yet, and I had to say no. (Andrea asked me about it later, too... I'd bought it in a hurry, and I am NOT that lactose-intolerant!) Talked to Julie, Quan, Isabel, baby Mattias, and others - Mattias just stared at me, and he's old enough to be distracted by keys now. Hugged Chris to welcome him home for four months, then eventually wondered where Eric was. Waved to Andrew who had cool sunglasses, and happened to see Jeremy on my way out of the hall. He said that Eric was counting money - I should have just interrupted him to make arrangements for Danielle's party! After that, Jeremy got his bike helmet caught on something connected to the staircase, and he almost fell! I caught him, though, and we laughed it off.

Went upstairs to the toddler Sunday School, where we told the kids about the swine flu since they weren't covering their mouths when coughing. I agreed with Auntie Fonda that I missed Rachel's grandma, and said I'd email her about the French guy who eats actual cars and bikes. (the latter grew out of little Amos saying that he'd make her some COOKING CARS to eat, hahaha) Sunday School went so long that almost everyone had left by the time I got downstairs - after Quan declared that she saw a floating car (Cordia: "She needs more sleep!"), I asked Citrus to call Nate (who had my cutlery) for me. He wasn't picking up, so I had lunch with my parents, grandma, Alan, and Polly again at the old Green Village, now Tsui Woo. I used my dad's cell to call Ivan, who didn't mind picking me up at Chapters after he picked up sushi. Too bad I didn't have a cellphone so he could contact me! (I should get one, maybe... but they are expensive!) Grandma almost left her red knitting bag behind, and I was able to see a $10 bill in her wad of bills.

After lunch, I checked out Buy-Lo / Shoppers / the dollar store at Kingsgate Mall. Bought Western Family Shake and Bake equivalent, two pounds of cookies for the toddler Sunday School (which I should divvy up into Ziploc bag later), and potato salad for Danielle's party. Briefly stopped by Staples, then went to Chapters to re-read ANNE OF INGLESIDE: those kids got up to crazy things! I want to get the box set at $48, but probably won't right now. Ivan picked me up late, but I certainly didn't mind. We eventually found Melia and Angus' condo, and went in. Winnie and her two kids were there - so was her husband Kenny, whom I haven't seen in years - I greeted him, of course. Went into the billiard room to write a card for little Megan - she seemed confused when I gave it to her, but Winnie thanked me for her. Jeff, Anita, and Allison came later on - baby Allison is so cute now!

Asked Harmony about their afternoon doings, which went okay. (she hasn't seen her parents yet since they're on a cruise!) She, Jon, Phil, Grace, and Daniel were talking about marriage advice and things like that: "alone time" as a couple, the "Michael and Amanda" model of marriage where she consults him on things like how many hours she should work in a week (but is in charge of things in the house), weekly family dinners, Daniel and Nathan's dad missing his wife's inconsistent annoyances and quirks, friendships and struggles, and more. At one point, I decided to see what the kids were doing; Allison looked at me and called me "big brother" - OUCH! I actually spent some time interacting with her, especially after she wanted Joey's phone to play with. She actually managed to dial four digits on it! Mike K., Emily L., Danielle, and others talked at her, too.

Gave Danielle her birthday gift - she'd seen the movie, but didn't have the ANNE prequel till now. Talked to others there, and played Apples to Apples for a bit - I was distracted by baby Allison, but still managed to tie Harmony for the lead till the birthday cake was brought in. I told her that Daniel and Nathan loved doing the Chinese HAPPY BIRTHDAY song, heh. Had a good time just talking to people and interacting more with baby Allison - maybe she'll know me more now, haha. Daniel said he could be ready to be a father, Michelle could be ready to be a mother, and that Nathan could be ready to be an uncle! Jon mentioned something about how the best man wouldn't have to perform OLD best man duties, such as making sure the marriage was consummated! I said that at least they wouldn't have maternal accompaniment on their honeymoon - Jon was surprised to hear that Grandma had accompained Mom and Dad on theirs!

When we were tidying up, some of the guys found A BOX OF USED CONDOMS under the pool table in the billiard room! Advice was given to thoroughly wash their hands AND their shirts when they got home - the guys had been sprawling across the pool table to make their shots! Mike K. said that it was NO WONDER that the room had been so hot! EWWWWWWW! Eric took me home, and Nathan said I'd almost forgot my cookies - I had no idea what he was talking about till we got to the car. "Oh, THOSE cookies!" Eric must have thought I was crazy - he certainly acted like it on the way home with all the usual jokes! (I noticed that he'd tried to call me when I got home - oops! But he'd seen me at the condo, so it was all good! This computer also restarted sometime during the day, too...)

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I dreamed that talking just made people mad!

WHAT THE HECK. Vancouver lost 6-3 last night! I also heard a mouse, so I'm getting out of here for sure! (and yes, I've said that before...) I went to bed just before midnight, and got up because it was too sunny just now... finished laundry, at any rate. Had a dream where Raymond and I were talking for a LONG TIME at a table - we managed to thoroughly piss off Randal and some other girl, hahaha.

Brian (whose birthday is today) seems to either be off Facebook, or done the "unfriending" thing - not sure which. Oh well. I'm sure I'll see him later at church so I can give him his birthday card! I also need to catch up on LJ dungeons and space adventures - maybe later on this week, since I have four of those things to do for my own entertainment!

Taken from Candy:

Leslie completed the quiz "What classic Disney movie describes your life?" with the result Lady and the Tramp. Your life is best described as the movie Lady and the Tramp. You are innocent, intelligent, and beautiful / handsome. You question how long your world will last, and how long you will still have a part in it. You fear being replaced by someone else in the world, but you stand up to your fears and take responsibility for the new job at hand. In doing so, you meet the love of your life who opens your mind to a whole new universe and shares a lovely plate of spaghetti with you.

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