Saturday, March 22, 2003

Three hours to craft a response?!

Finally sent off my reply to that person before dinner.. it sounded too formal, but I got a formal letter.. I'll respond in kind. Since it took me over three hours to craft a response, I'm damn glad I didn't get an autoreply spat back at me. (coz.. if I had.. I'd KILL.. hehehe) I will forgive him, but trust might be some time in coming. Hopefully, he realizes that.

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Abject apologies through email?

Aiya. Just checked my email, and what do I find? An email from the dude that's apparently full of apologies. (I say "apparently" because I haven't read beyond the subject line..) Now, I want to deal with this.. and I have Ice Wolf, Spocko, and Corey here to help me do so. Definitely want to extend grace to him as well.. (insert line about Christ's example here)

Okay, so I'll read it already. It appears in the "abject apology vein," and I think I'll respond by saying how much stramash it was. (plus a few other things too..) Forgiveness / trust / apology.. yikes. What a week this has been for learning about these things.

And.. at least I read my emails and attempt to reply to them, instead of just deleting them (albeit with an autoreply about how cruelly I've hurt the other person). :P

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Jack Bauer killed the one dentist who didn't recommend Trident.

Jack Bauer Facts!

I'll post these in parts of about 100 each, haha.

1. Jack Bauer and Chuck Norris were stuck in a room together once. After 3 minutes, Chuck Norris left crying without a scratch on him.
2. If you shoot Jack Bauer, you better believe he will interrogate your bullet, and know who shot at him.
3. When you get in a fistfight with Jack Bauer, he kills you with your own fists.
4. The Butterfly Effect was originally going to star Jack Bauer, but they realized there was nothing to go back in time and correct.
5. Jack Bauer as the new spokesperson for Verizon: "You're gonna hear me now. It's just a matter of how much you want it to hurt."
6. When Jack Bauer was on The Price is Right, he won the showcase showdown by torturing Bob Barker until he told him the exact price of his showcase.
7. Meatloaf once sang, "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that." Jack Bauer did "that." Twice.
8. If Jack Bauer was at your party, it would be the longest day of your life.
9. Pandora actually opened Bauer's Box.
10. Jack Bauer likes to go bowling on the weekends. By "bowling," I mean "killing"... and by "on the weekends," I mean "anytime he feels like it."
11. When Jack Bauer m*sturbates, he doesn't touch himself at all. He just threatens his b*lls.
12. Jack Bauer doesn't own Tivo. His VCR simply lives in fear of ever forgetting to record his shows again.
13. If you Tivo 24, Jack Bauer will kill you. Jack Bauer f*cking waits for no one.
14. Jack Bauer watches 24 every Monday night as a weekly reminder of how badass he is.
15. Jack Bauer is right behind you. By the time you turn around, he'll be in hiding.
16. The only time we'd ever have to fear the French Army is if Jack Bauer became a French citizen.
17. Jack Bauer sleeps with a night light. Not because he is scared of the dark, but because the dark is scared of Jack Bauer.
18. Jack Bauer doesn't need a watch. Time follows him.
19. Jack Bauer's shadow has 8 kills.
20. When God said, "Let there be light," it was so Jack Bauer could see who he was going to shoot.
21. Having sex with Jack Bauer has also been called "Lethal Injection."
22. If Jack Bauer was on Oceanic Flight 815, he'd have been off the island with 23 hours and 59 minutes to spare.
23. In the time it takes you to read this, Jack Bauer would have already ended your life and moved on to your neighbors.
24. Geico just saved a bunch of money on their car insurance by switching to Jack Bauer.
25. The X-Files are no longer on TV. That's because Jack solved them all.
26. What should you tell a terrorist that's been shot three times? Nothing. Jack Bauer already is about to ask him his first question.
27. Jack Bauer has cancer, and cancer prays for its life.
28. On Halloween, Jack Bauer goes as himself.
29. Jack Bauer plays Kiefer Sutherland on TV. Needless to say, Jack Bauer is the world's greatest actor.
30. For 24: The Game (PS2), there will be three levels of difficulty; Normal, Hard, and Jack Bauer.
31. Audrey had a visible reaction when she learned that Jack was still alive: Orgasm. Multiple.
32. Jack Bauer can piss in the corner of a circular room.
33. If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, it's because Jack Bauer is bending him over.
34. Jack Bauer doesn't like it when people copy Chuck Norris facts and substitute his name. He will gun down your family for that.
35. Jack Bauer beat Tetris.
36. When Jack Bauer runs with scissors, someone WILL get hurt, and it won't be Jack Bauer.
37. When Jack Bauer sends in his taxes, he sends a blank form along with a picture of himself with a gun. Jack Bauer has not had to pay taxes ever.
38. When Jack Bauer orders a pizza with toppings, he gets pepperoni and glass. He picks off the pepperoni.
39. Jack Bauer killed the one dentist who didn't recommend Trident.
40. Jack Bauer has one weakness: Kim's stupidity.
41. No one says "Who's your daddy?" to Kim Bauer and lives to tell about it.
42. Jack Bauer doesn't use a stunt double. Stunt doubles use Jack Bauer.
43. The Chinese didn't admit that Jack actually repeatedly spoke two words during the two years of Chinese torture: at the end of each session, he said "That tickled."
44. Jesus turned water into wine. Jack Bauer turns blood from a terrorist he shot in the kneecaps into truth serum.
45. Jack Bauer tortured Amnesty International until they agreed to endorse torture.
46. Jack Bauer doesn't need a gun to kill terrorists. Guns just want in on the action.
47. Jack Bauer knows what you did last summer.
48. A policeman once pulled over Jack Bauer. Upon realizing his mistake, the cop promptly arrested himself. Jack then shot him in the face anyways.
49. If you are reading this, Jack Bauer has not killed you. Yet.
50. If Jack Bauer was killed, God would wake up in a cold sweat and realize he was just having a nightmare.
51. Jack Bauer shaves the sights off his guns. They get in his way when he is trying to shoot.
52. Jack Bauer fills his plug-in air freshener with Sentox nerve gas.
53. When in the presence of Jack Bauer, Chuck Norris urinates sitting down.
54. If Jack Bauer asks for your car, give it to him. And your wife.
55. Jack Bauer added his own face to Mount Rushmore. Barehanded.
56. Jack Bauer tortures his family members to find out what he's getting for Christmas.
57. The FBI and CIA both use the show 24 as their primary training videos. Our investigators are still trying to discern what was used before 2001.
58. Little girl on the milk carton, Jack Bauer knows where you are.
59. It takes Jack Bauer 20 minutes to watch 60 minutes.
60. Kobe Bryant will pass the ball when Jack Bauer tells him to.
61. Jack Bauer forced the Blackberry settlement so he could send a message to Mike Novick during Season 5.
62. Most people start their day with a bowl of cereal. Jack Bauer starts his day with a 9mm and a double figure body count.
63. Jack Bauer can get a homeless guy to say who he's working for.
64. Jack Bauer can't go behind enemy lines. The enemies are behind Jack Bauer's line.
65. Jack was going to cut Chase's hand off anyway. The bomb just gave him an excuse.
66. When people said that 24 had "jumped the shark," Jack Bauer jumped into the tank and killed the shark with his bare hands.
67. The reason there is a 50% divorce rate in the United States is because Jack Bauer is still single.
68. Jeeves asks Jack Bauer.
69. President Logan is not scared because he knows the terrorists are threatening America. He is scared because he knows Jack Bauer can take over anytime he wants.
70. The truth may set you free, but only if Jack Bauer says it's okay.
71. Jack Bauer doesn't need to "establish a perimeter." He is the perimeter.
72. When Jack Bauer does push-ups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the world down.
73. The cartoon that the Muslims are so angry about is really a drawing of Jack Bauer.
74. Jack Bauer has stared death in the face so many times that Jack is no longer afraid of death. Death is afraid of Jack.
75. Studio execs pitched a Jack Bauer vs The Terminator movie. Upon hearing about this, The Terminator killed itself.
76. While playing Clue, instead of investigating the rooms, Jack interrogates the Colonel until he tells him who killed Mr. Boddy.
77. When a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear the sound, Jack Bauer hears it.
78. It never rains on Jack Bauer because nature knows better.
79. When Jack Bauer wants drive-through, he gets it. If the restaurant doesn't have a drive-through, they end up with one anyway.
80. Jack Bauer doesn't have to blow in his old Nintendo cartridges to make them work.
81. Jack Bauer understands the words that are coming out of Chris Tucker's mouth, but it's just easier to shoot him.
82. Even if Red Bull does give you wings, Jack Bauer will keep you on the f*cking ground.
83. Even if you get shot in the neck or blown up in an explosion, if Jack Bauer needs you to work... you're coming back to work, dammit.
84. Jack Bauer once passed a kidney stone so large that he called it Edgar and put it to work at CTU.
85. Jack Bauer does not pull out. The girl must know when to push away or else it's her problem.
86. The Ten Commandments has an asterisk, excluding Jack Bauer from having to obey all of the above.
87. It's a simple arrangement in God's equation. Jesus Saves His children and Jack Bauer kills His mistakes.
88. When Jack Bauer is asleep, time stops.
89. There once 'was' a man from Nantucket. Jack Bauer shot him.
90. To Jack Bauer, "Dammit" isn't just a cuss word, it's a way of life.
91. Jack Bauer places a bag of flaming dog poop on Satan's front porch every week. Satan knows Jack is doing it, but he can't do anything about it.
92. To give the terrorists a fighting chance, Jack Bauer will start throwing bullets.
93. Jack Bauer never really learned how to fly a helicopter, but it flew perfectly anyway. The helicopter was scared of what would happen if it didn't cooperate.
94. Jack Bauer turns left on red.
95. Jack Bauer was once slapped and told to turn the other cheek. He did, but only to reach for his gun.
96. Jack Bauer always answers the phone with "Yeah!" Other people say "Hello."
97. Jack Bauer was once abducted by aliens, and this explains why scientists haven't discovered intelligent life in the universe.
98. There are two certainties for everyone in life, death and taxes. For Jack Bauer, there's only one certainty. And that's why he hired a good accountant.
99. Sometimes Jack Bauer likes to play dodgeball with little kids. Not with a ball, but actually throwing little kids at each other.
100. If you're in Jack Bauer's hands, you're not covered under our policy. That's Allstate's stand.

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Pepsi Blue and one more take on the whole thing...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY. SARAH.. it's been great getting to know you, and I hope you have a great day! :)

The speaker tonight was quite good, and the extended time we had afterwards to just hang out and eat was terrific. Talked to a lot of people, found out a couple of birthdays, and went to Daimasu afterwards. Had a great time with friends. Combining Ruby Red Grapefruit and Pepsi Blue will ideally result in a purplish drink.. and this was my idea, not my brother's. :P

If Kempy is reading this.. email me or something. I want to say something nice to you, but don't have any ways in which to do so. (besides putting it here.. I'm not even sure you read this regularly..) (and if anyone that knows him is reading this, tell him the same from me, okay? thanks!)

Here's one more take on the whole thing now.. even after I said I officially was done with it. Had more stuff to say, I guess.. :P

My initial reaction was a frozen shocked paralysis;
With anger, hurt, and sadness coursing through my veins.
Trying to pretend it didn't have any effect on me
(though some of you do know differently)

I attempted to explain my take on it,
Got an email autoreply spit back at me for my trouble
(indicating he had deleted it sight unseen)
Despair and more hurt are my lot STILL...

Read what he had to say about it somewhere,
Still don't know how / what to feel or do...
Diversion with friends is good.. gimme lots of it!
Meanwhile, 'tis time to invoke Big Sugar.. and contain feelings.

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Friday, March 21, 2003

Laughter and watermelon bubble tea

Laughter is always a good diversion. (and yes.. I will probably have plenty of that tonight too.. yay!) Had a watermelon bubble tea at the mall earlier today, as well. So that was a good thing.

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Going to Fellowship with Pho!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOE! It's been great having you as a friend, and I hope you have an awesome day! :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SOPHIA! It's been definitely awesome knowing you all these years, and I hope you have a rocking one! :) (let's seriously hope you and John did NOT catch that killer virus whilst in Hong Kong, eh..)

Tonight I'm actually going to go out; woohoo! Daniel and David are combined, with a guest speaker.. my brother's going to go there even earlier than usual, but that's okay. I'll just eat Pho or something to pass the time.. very healthy and yummy. (and.. I don't have to wash my great-cook mother's myriad dishes :P) That'll certainly be good.. seeing everyone on a Friday for the usual length of time will be awesome. Now, let's hope that Nathan has my Bathroom Reader.. heck, it's been part of my MSN name for a couple of weeks.. but even if he doesn't, I'll definitely still love him anyway! :P

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Thursday, March 20, 2003

Blathering on about other things... stupid autoreplies!

Okay, now I'm officially going to blather on about other things in here.. turns out the "reply" was one of those automatically generated ones that goes out when you delete your email without reading it. Nothing more I can do.. it's his problem then if he doesn't read what I write. Don't think I'll be trying to do anything with that for quite some time yet. That's it.. it's over. (I could hide under the cloak of invisibility, but I refuse to do that.. heck, after a certain operation.. that renders it moot anyhow)

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Emails and oddly appropriate song titles

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MIKE! Hope you have a great day! :)

Well, I just now sent him an email detailing my feelings on the whole situation. Whether or not he responds is up to him.. I'm certainly not going to be anxiously waiting for a response if only because I have a pessimistic feeling about this. (and usually people think I'm so optimistic, too.. har har) Definitely shock played a role in my feelings, and I still hope we can resolve this. Thanks again to all who gave me advice / distraction / amusement.. you guys rock!

Definitely war now, what with anti-aircraft fire / bombs / who knows what else. For some strange reason, this reminds me of the song title Bombs Over Baghdad.. strangely appropriate now. Then again, so is the song title In A World Called Catastrophe. (if I said who sang it, I know at least one of you would give me a virtual smackdown, hehehehe) Guess we'll see what happens..

Hmm. He just sent me a reply; I'll get to it at a more reasonable hour. (I refuse to get too emotionally hung-up over this..)

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Wednesday, March 19, 2003

It's war now!

Well, that 48-hour deadline has come and gone.. guess it's war now. Welcome to the end of the world as we know it, indeed.. (and bonus points to anyone who gets the reference :P)

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Good luck with baby Baxter!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, COREY! I know I just gave you a shout-out a few days ago, and all of that still holds true. Certainly hope you have an awesome day, and that you get the guitar! :)

I'd just like to take this opportunity to wish Andrew and Rhiannon Glancey all the very best of luck with the new baby Baxter! :) You'll treasure sleep, or so I hear. Glad to know everyone's doing well, too! Congratulations!

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Tuesday, March 18, 2003

Lessons for Life

This is from the Archive of Email Forwards.

Lessons for Life:

1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

2. Memorize your favorite poem.

3. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have, or loaf all you want.

4. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

5. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

6. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

7. Believe in love at first sight.

8. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

9. Love deeply and passionately. You may get hurt, but it's the only way to live life completely.

10. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name-calling.

11. Don't judge people by their relatives, or by the life they were born into.

12. Teach yourself to speak slowly, but think quickly.

13. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

14. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

15. Call your mother.

16. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

17. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

18. Follow the three Rs: Respect for self, Respect for others, Responsibility for all your actions.

19. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

20. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

21. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

22. Marry a person you love to talk to. As you get older, his / her conversational skills will be even more important.

23. Spend some time alone.

24. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.

25. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

26. Read more books. Television is no substitute.

27. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.

28. Trust in God, but lock your car.

29. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life. Do all you can to create a tranquil, harmonious home.

30. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.

31. Don't just listen to what someone is saying. Listen to why they are saying it.

32. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.

33. Be gentle with the earth.

34. Pray or meditate. There's immeasurable power in it.

35. Never interrupt when you are being flattered.

36. Mind your own business.

37. Don't trust anyone who doesn't close his / her eyes when you kiss.

38. Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.

39. If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. It is wealth's greatest satisfaction.

40. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

41. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

42. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

43. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

44. Live with the knowledge that your character is your destiny.

45. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

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Distraction at the mall, Bon Jovi, and the Gin Blossoms

Just got back from being out.. the mall provided just enough distraction for me. I had to buy things for myself, and birthday presents for certain people anyhow. (may as well do it before I forget) Definitely have a bit of a clearer head now; focusing too much on what happened is not a good thing.

Heard a Bon Jovi song (It's My Life) and wanted to listen to some Bon Jovi.. however, I don't have the CDs, and I wasn't about to buy any. So the Gin Blossoms it is. :)

(I know Bon Jovi and the Gin Blossoms aren't quite the same thing musically, but I don't care. :P The two artists just seem to evoke similar kinds of emotions right now, is all..)

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Global Security

Here's a link to news on the impending war:

Global Security

Things could change, too.. who knows what'll happen? But that site has lots of good, unbiased stuff.. which I will check out later as I'm on the run. (distraction is a good thing, too)

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Totally empty email inbox before I go to bed

So what to say here and now? I don't know.. except that I should go to bed, but am still checking my email. Don't know why I feel the need to have a totally empty email inbox before I go to bed.. cursing the computer and endlessly restarting the machine tonight does not help, and neither do weird Yahoo mail account errors. (problems accessing my account, internal errors whenever I try to view a vaguely important attachment in my email, etc.) Oh well.. hopefully things will be resolved soon. (mad props of gratitude to all I've shared stuff with.. you rock!) Then again, I should really take my friend's advice and go to bed NOW. Eh.. might as well before I fall asleep at the keyboard.

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Monday, March 17, 2003

Political posts, favors, appreciations, strange peace

I'd like to add that political posts are SO not my forte, but there might be more coming. Who knows.. I did the last two as a favor for Spoz and G; whether they check this blog for today's political stuff doesn't really matter, but I know they probably will. ;)

I would also like to thank a few people (their names are withheld, since they're a classified secret ;) ) for their perspective on everything that happened last night. You offered me your listening ears (so to speak, or type.. hehehe); provided distraction, advice, and amusement; and allowed me to vent my initial percolating emotions. I definitely love you all, and think you're all golden. :)

Note / reminder to readers of this: When I use the word "love" while referring to people (as in the last sentence of the previous paragraph), I am talking purely platonic, friendly feelings of affection. (either here, in IMs, or otherwise) If I meant "love" as in real love, I'd damn well say so. (never mind that it seems to have eluded me.. not like I'm actively looking for it, but it would be nice to have someday..) For now, platonic love is fine by me.. being friends seems less complicated than being in a relationship.

Though I must say, it's strangely quiet / peaceful without the almost-constant IMs that might be normally be going on now between us. Not to say I don't miss it at all (and wouldn't ever want it back), but for now.. it's nice. (and I'm not too sure I'd want it right now, either) I'm not out to totally crucify him either; that's not really my style.. so if you wanted me to, I'm afraid you'll just have to be very disappointed. ;)

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Presidential 15-minute speeches

Just listened to the presidential 15-minute speech.. Bush said all the things people expected him to say. Gave the ultimatum ("Saddam Hussein and his sons must leave Iraq within 48 hours, or there will be a military conflict at a time of our choosing.."), called Saddam Hussein a tyrant, said that all foreign reporters / aid workers / inspectors must leave very soon, said that the UN hasn't lived up to its mandate, told the Iraqi people listening to the broadcast that the measures would only be used against the "lawless men" who rule Iraq and weren't meant to harm the civilians (and the US would give the people food, clothing, aid.. and help them build a new free democratic country), mentioned weapons of mass destruction.. He also said that the world would be a better place without Hussein and his ilk.. so there must be some world leaders who agree with him about Hussein.

I don't know what to think myself, not knowing much about politics and everything else interconnected with it. Guess we shall see what happens in the days / weeks / months / years to come..

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Well, I almost never watch CNN (the last time was on the anniversary of Sept. 11).. but as I put it to Spoz a couple of hours ago: "I almost never watch CNN.. but for the both of us, I will. :P" (apparently a funny line, as I got a "hahahahaha" out of that one) I hear that President Bush is going to make an address to the nation at 8 PM EST. (about 3.5 hours from now) So I guess we'll see if the US does go to war against Iraq. Also, Jean Chretien (our prime minister here) has just announced in Parliament that Canada will not support any war moves the US military makes against Iraq.. an announcement that was greeted with storms of applause. In the last few weeks, Canada had been playing a neutral role and trying to find some solution that didn't involve such a drastic measure. (and you don't want to know about the cost of rebuilding Iraq according to the US Congress.. the potential war hasn't even started yet, either..)

Just heard that the only way Saddam Hussein can avoid war would be to step down, give up power, and go totally into exile with his sons and all his government officials within 48 hours.. do you really think he'll follow that "Exile Or Else" ultimatum from Bush? ("Leave Iraq, or face the destruction of your regime.") I don't know about that at all.. plenty of anti-war rallies in the past days and weeks, and Robin Cook has resigned his cabinet position in protest over Britain's stance on this. I have almost no idea about the politics of war or what will happen.. but let's hope we're all still here at this time next week / month / year..

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Happy St. Patrick's Day! / Kemporalia style

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY to all of you (honorary) Irish people out there today! ;)

(note: this is my attempt to use the Kempy style while injecting my own personality into it.. of course, I realize Kempy is much less literal and factual than I am.. oh well)

He called me all these endearing terms
And paid me all these compliments..
It was all platonic, or so I thought;
Distance has a way of minimizing chances of seriousness, right?

He said that he'd posted some "I love you" blog entry about me;
It was all about the good qualities he thought I had..
I was funny / smart / joyful / incredibly sweet / rather cute,
And he had more than a bit of a crush on me.

I expressed shock and dismay (quite damn rightly too!);
He asked if he should delete the entry..
For some reason, I wanted to see it for myself;
So I told him to hang on while I read it (bad idea..)

I like getting compliments from friends of mine;
They make me feel loved and cared for / about..
But that was SO horribly embarrassing (his blog prediction)..
My face turned extremely red while reading it.

It was true that I asked (with maybe a bit of edge),
"How about I delete all mentions of you in my blog?"
He said "OK," but I had no idea he'd apparently take it
Like I didn't want to associate with him anymore..

He asked me again if he should delete what he wrote;
I don't know if I felt ready to deal with the situation..
Every neuron in my brain was screaming, "DELETE!"
But I somehow couldn't type that out to send..

After I had to take my own version of "time-out"
(ie. 15 minutes spent taking a much-needed shower)..
I went back to the computer with a clearer head;
All prepared to tell him to delete away..

In the interim, he'd apparently come to a decision..
When I told him to delete, he did, and said goodbye.
At first, I wanted him to stay.. to work things out..
Then I realized it was for the better if he logged off.

He did apologize a couple of times before he left;
I wasn't altogether unwilling to accept them,
But again couldn't make my fingers type those words.
I may need to apologize in my turn later, perhaps..

All these conflicting emotions.. sadness / annoyance;
Hurt / major embarrassment / a bit of anger at both of us;
Helplessness / loss / a wish to start over again / distancing..
What to do? I have NO idea.. we're both to blame, I'd guess..

Time might do a lot to heal things over, I hear..
This wound is still suppurating, raw, and WAAAAAAAAY too fresh;
The stubborn "I won't ever reinitiate contact first" mentality
Will do me no good.. but I don't want reminders now..

So no contact for me yet at all..
Give it a lot of time if it will happen.
And if not, then so be it..
This is awfully fatalistic, isn't it?

Guess we shall see what happens..
We can co-exist online maturely, I hope.
I have talked (and will talk) to people about this;
Oddly, I feel better.. but then again, not really.

This is the first time we've had conflict
And I don't think I like the feeling
Of this vast emotional hell I'm suddenly in,
But que sera sera, n'est ce pas?

Pretending he doesn't exist / blocking him?
If I really hated him, I might do so..
But I don't feel like that now at all;
Maybe I'll leave it all up to chance.. things *must* get better!

Probably he thinks I'm mad at him;
He's probably mad at ME..
I wouldn't blame him one bit..
Definitely not at all..

The thing is that I'm not, really..
Oh sure.. maybe a little bit annoyed.
Why did he tell me about the entry in the first place?
Who knows.. I'm not sure I would have seen it anyhow.

Oh well.. I'll let some time pass by before attempting to talk;
Hopefully, other distractions will enter both our minds.
Perhaps it'll be a few weeks or a little longer;
I don't want to leave this hanging forever or unresolved.

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Sunday, March 16, 2003

Hilarious Quotes of the Week!


No, it's not a "weekly bubble tea tally," as one of you was suggesting.. sorry, but I don't drink bubble tea that often. (so such a thing would not be justifiable) Instead, it's a "hilarious quotes archive" of sorts.. the quotes (with context) that I found really funny during the week. You may or may not find them funny, but it's not like anyone's keeping score of who said what, and how many times a particular person is mentioned during a month. ;) If, upon reading this, you don't think a particular quote should be included.. email / IM me with your reasons why.. and I'll probably take it out unless your reason isn't good enough or rude. (though I will try to ask for permission in some cases)


"They're so brown!" -- Justin C., upon looking at one of my brother's Mexico pictures featuring a bunch of Mexican students. (Sunday, March 9) [no, he's not racist or anything.. he's just given to blurting out random things like this ALL THE TIME.. and what DID he expect, anyhow?]

"dude.. wot's with the weird name? why with such a weird title?" -- Spoz, finally commenting on some MSN name I'd had up for three days. {"Nathan: Bathroom Reader BOOK! Danielle: Collective Soul CD!"} (Tuesday, March 11) [both these friends of mine are on MSN, and I wanted my stuff back; at least I got the CD back from Danielle today!]

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Jack Bauer won Monopoly with one house on Baltic.

Jack Bauer Facts!

I'll post these in parts of about 100 each, haha.

1. In Con Air, Nicolas Cage says: "There are only two men I trust. One is me and the other's not you." The other person is Jack Bauer.
2. In second grade, Jack Bauer sent the teacher to the principal's office.
3. Jack Bauer got Tyler Durden to talk about Fight Club. Then Jack beat the piss out of him.
4. Kiefer Sutherland smokes cigarettes. Jack Bauer smokes terrorists.
5. On Halloween, Jack Bauer always has candy because no one tricks Jack Bauer.
6. Every time someone gets their ass kicked, Jack Bauer gets a royalty.
7. When Jack Bauer sees a crime, he doesn't call for backup; he calls a coroner.
8. When Jack Bauer says "DAMN IT," God actually damns someone.
9. Jack Bauer prefers windows... doors are for women, children, and people he kicks through them.
10. After being framed for David Palmer's murder, Jack cleared his own name and found the real killer. Not in the name of justice, but because he is too much of a man to accept charity on his body count.
11. Jack Bauer tortures foreigners into speaking in English.
12. What do you call Jack Bauer with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Extremely dangerous.
13. Jack's PC repairs its own errors when he types a secret password: "Son of a b*tch."
14. Jack Bauer doesn't just think 'outside of the box.' He breaks out of it. And sometimes, he has to sneak into the box just to break back out.
15. 75% of Earth is covered by water. The other 25% is covered by Jack Bauer.
16. They should change CTU to CBU: Counting on Bauer Unit.
17. Contrary to popular belief, Kobe Bryant did not get Shaquille O'Neal traded to the Miami Heat. In fact, Shaq asked to be traded as far away from L.A. as possible, fearing that Jack Bauer will see the movie Kazaam and think that O'Neal is Middle Eastern.
18. If Jack Bauer wants to have a minute alone with you... well, basically you're f*cked.
19. For every result you get during a Google search, Jack Bauer tortured someone to get it up there.
20. Jack Bauer's Tic Tacs don't make noise in his pocket.
21. The reason we sleep well at night is because Jack Bauer doesn't.
22. Jack Bauer doesn't make mistakes. He makes more chances to kill.
23. Natural selection only works because Jack Bauer personally kills all the weak creatures. Jack Bauer does not tolerate weakness.
24. Jack Bauer managed to get a second bag of peanuts from the flight attendant even though the airline does not serve peanuts.
25. Many believe the 24 video game is unfun, as Jack cannot get hurt and kills all terrorists with one shot. The makers of the game simply state that they want to be a simulation of Jack's life.
26. Justin Gatlin tied the 100m world record this year because Jack Bauer was after him.
27. As a fetus, Jack Bauer went from conception to full term in only 24 hours, after which he shot his way out of the womb.
28. The chief export of Jack Bauer is dead terrorists.
29. Jack Bauer once donated blood to a hospital. The doctors realized that no man could ever receive Jack Bauer's blood directly. They had do something with it, though. This is why we now have steroids.
30. If Jack Bauer says "Dammit!" more than once in a 24-hour period, don't be in L.A.
31. If your wife is having sex with Jack Bauer, pray to God that she gets pregnant.
32. Nobody speaks while Jack Bauer speaks, which is why the entire world is silent for approximately 1 hour on Mondays.
33. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the A-Team, AND the Ghostbusters all have Jack Bauer lunchboxes.
34. Life is like a box of chocolates, unless Jack Bauer is torturing your ass and you want to die. Then life is like a box of sh*t.
35. Jack Bauer turns his regular bathtub into a jacuzzi simply by intimidating the water until it begins trembling in fear.
36. There is only one thing that Jack Bauer would do for a Klondike bar. It begins with a "K" and ends with "ILL."
37. Jack Bauer was only wrong once, and that was when he thought he was wrong, but he was actually right.
38. "Panic! At the Disco" was originally called "At the Disco." Then Jack Bauer showed up.
39. Jack Bauer's high school counselor told him to "shoot for the stars." Jack Bauer has now destroyed over 1,216 stars using only a pistol.
40. The United States government does not cover up the existence of aliens, they cover up the fact that Jack Bauer has killed them all.
41. Jack Bauer won Monopoly with one house on Baltic.
42. Jack Bauer told Elvis to leave the building.
43. Saddam wasn't found by the military. He heard Jack Bauer was coming and turned himself in.
44. Jack Bauer spells "idiot" L-o-g-a-n.
45. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. An apple a day does not keep Jack Bauer away, it gets you shot. Jack Bauer loves apples. Don't eat Jack Bauer's apples.
46. There's a reason why getting your car stolen is referred to as being "Jacked."
47. If Jack thought twice about killing you, then you're already dead.
48. Jack Bauer can take two years off from CTU and still remember all his access codes, because they know better than to change them while he's gone.
49. Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Jack Bauer.
50. Jack Bauer knows why the Mona Lisa is smiling.
51. If Jack Bauer was on the Titanic, the icebergs would have moved out of the way.
52. Jack Bauer won two awards on Sunday at the Screen Actors Guild awards. One for best actor in a drama series, and another for baddest motherf*cker on earth.
53. Jack Bauer once thought he'd saved the world with 61 seconds to spare. Then he found his watch was a minute fast.
54. There is no Santa Claus because Jack Bauer didn't get what he asked for when he was five.
55. Superman has two weaknesses: kryptonite and Jack Bauer.
56. The real reason Jack Bauer was fired from CTU was his massive cell phone bill.
57. Jack Bauer always goes for it on 4th down.
58. There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's Jack Bauer.
59. Superman once hid behind Jack Bauer in a fire-fight.
60. Charmin attempted to put out a "Jack Bauer Toilet Paper." It had to be recalled because Jack Bauer takes sh*t from nobody.
61. Jack Bauer wires a flash bang to his alarm clock every night before bed.
62. Jack Bauer fell asleep during the movie Mission Impossible. To Jack, there is no mission impossible.
63. Jack Bauer goes from 0-to-kill in less than 3 seconds.
64. Rudolph the red nosed reindeer... did not have a red nose until Jack Bauer pistol-whipped his ass.
65. When God said "Let there be light," Jack Bauer said "Say please."
66. When Jack Bauer opens a pack of Twix, there are three.
67. There are no natural disasters in California. Except for earthquakes. This is because the earth trembles in fear of Jack Bauer.
68. Jack Bauer killed Kenny. They didn't call him a b*stard afterwards.
69. When the other Boy Scouts were tying knots, Jack Bauer was defusing nukes.
70. Jack Bauer's voice can be heard in the new Apple commercial. Bill Gates immediately switched to a Mac.
71. Jesus wears a T-shirt that says "Jack Bauer is my homeboy."
72. "Have it your way" wasn't a slogan at Burger King until Jack Bauer came in. Jack Bauer f*cking hates tomatoes.
73. Jack Bauer, cashing in on his super-power ability to get to anywhere in L.A. in 15 minutes, is the employee of the month at Domino's... for 5 years straight.
74. Jack Bauer invented the Jedi Mind trick. His only needed two words: "Trust me."
75. You can run, but you can't hide. Unless Jack Bauer is after you... then you can't do either.
76. Jack Bauer isn't hung like a horse, horses are hung like Jack Bauer.
77. When a burning bush appears to Jack Bauer telling him what to do, Jack pisses out the flames. Jack listens to nobody.
78. Jack Bauer does the Sunday New York Times Crossword Puzzle in ink.
79. In grade school, young Jack Bauer once shot a kid while going for the final remaining seat in "Musical Chairs."
80. If Jack Bauer says "Sh*t," you say "What shape, Agent Bauer?"
81. Jack Bauer once shot off a man's penis during an interrogation. He later apologized, not realizing that regular men only have one penis.
82. The only reason the Energizer Bunny keeps going and going is because Jack Bauer is on its tail.
83. The soup Nazi gives Jack Bauer extra crackers.
84. Only a nuclear explosion can change Jack's mind.
85. Jack Bauer can make a man-purse look cool.
86. Jack Bauer had to kill his first girlfriend. She was sick of being on the bottom during sex -- but Jack wouldn't compromise on his positions. Jack Bauer never compromises his position.
87. Jack Bauer cannot be linked to Kevin Bacon.
88. Jack Bauer can get 24 in Blackjack and still win. Jack doesn't bust until he feels like it.
89. The sound of Jack's voice can triple your testicle size. Just ask Petty Officer Rooney.
90. When E.T. phoned home, Jack Bauer answered.
91. By Season 8 of 24, Jack Bauer will have taken more human lives than he has saved. Whoever's left will throw a party to commemorate the occasion.
92. There's a reason why no one at Jack's elementary school ever played Cops and Robbers.
93. Lightning doesn't strike in the same place twice, unless Jack Bauer tells it to.
94. Jack Bauer doesn't need weapons, weapons need Jack Bauer.
95. Jack Bauer doesn't walk. The ground under him moves.
96. 80% of all stolen helicopters in the state of California are the direct result of Jack Bauer.
97. Mimes tell Jack Bauer who they work for.
98. Jack Bauer's bowels don't move. He sits on the toilet and scares the sh*t out of himself.
99. Grand Theft Auto doesn't have a 7 star wanted level. You don't want Jack Bauer after you, even in a video game.
100. Jack Bauer didn't invent torture, he perfected it.

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Feeling rested on a Sunday, for once

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JULIE! I've very much enjoyed talking to you over the years, and here's hoping you have an awesome day! :) Remember, I was the one who taught you how to use a vending machine ("there's too many options to choose from!") at Summer Conference 2000.. ;) Brian told me just to decide for you, but I figured that at 12, you were old enough to use it yourself with a little bit of help from me!

For once, I actually feel rested on a Sunday.. even though I slept at 1:30 AM.. weeeeeeeeeird. Might stand me in good stead, coz I have a long meeting later.. um, yay? Mind you, it's not a "completely refreshed" sort of rested, but it's better than how I normally feel.. wooyeah!

My brother's coming home today.. very good thing! Woohoo! :)

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