Went to Sears, IndigoSpirit, and London Drugs to get birthday gifts for Amos, Harrison, Conor, David, Evelyn, and Dave - got a Bathroom Reader (plus blue dragon bookmark), on-sale Transformers toys, crayons, DORA THE EXPLORER and THOMAS THE TRAIN ENGINE books! I don't think the twins know how to read yet, but I'm sure they'll enjoy flipping through the books. There was a DORA coloring book at London Drugs, but Evelyn seems to like looking at books. I saw Minute Rice for $3.99 on sale, so of course I had to get that! Picked up my sweatpants at the alteration store, too - certainly better than getting my mother to sew them for me! (especially after subsequent events)
It's true that I shouldn't be draining my savings account, but I told myself I'd put in $100 on Wednesday. Besides, it's better than the inevitable money drain in December, hahaha. Had abalone, garlic bread,
siu choy, and other stuff while discussing the Olympics, drugs, Scott, Bridges restaurant, Our Lady Peace, inspiring stories, and more. That part of dinner was fine, especially when my sister said that she is going on an all-expenses-paid trip to Japan in a couple of weeks! My mom called Steph my "daughter" and admitted that 99% of the dishes had cooking wine in them. We also had blueberry wine (which Grandma actually tried), and other stuff. The REAL shit started to go down in the kitchen... I HATE HER! Talked to Billie when I got home, too - yes, this is abuse!
My mom called Steph my "daughter" and admitted that 99% of the dishes had cooking wine in them. We also had blueberry wine (which Grandma actually tried), and other stuff. The REAL shit started to go down in the kitchen - I said I was going to the bathroom, and my mom actually tried to say "No" because she probably thought I was trying to avoid doing the dishes. Well, I went anyway. This is how subsequent events went, as I talked about it with Billie:
[21:32:12] AlenaBrolxFlami: my mother literally pushed me around when I said I wouldn't do more than about a REAL one-third-ish of the dishes!
[21:32:27] shaydexx: ahhh!
[23:17:54] AlenaBrolxFlami: to be fair, my objection was NOT to doing the dishes - I understand that she put in a lot of time over this dinner, and certainly understand showing your appreciation by saying THANKS or doing the dishes so the cook doesn't have to - but she also called me STUPID when I said that I could plainly see that her "definition" of "one-third" of the dishes (which was "two-thirds") was not right ("I'm not stupid")
[00:12:22] AlenaBrolxFlami: then while I *was* doing the dishes, she tried calling me STUPID again, and trying to say that I was never appreciative of anything - I figured that I didn't need to stand around and hear this, so took a stand and said exactly that
[00:12:39] shaydexx: right on!
[00:13:47] AlenaBrolxFlami: I mean... when I was a kid, I had no choice, right? but now... I'm not saying I'm the best daughter in the world (and I probably DO need to appreciate the parents a little more), but.... really now. I'm actually DOING SOMETHING for you, and then that happens?!
[00:14:00] shaydexx: yeah!
[00:16:02] AlenaBrolxFlami: before, she had told me to finish a sink FULL of dishes (which she just kept adding to) - while I'm used to orders from her (and I'll say right now that I'm not exactly the most polite person ever either, but...) - she ERUPTED and said that there were limits and she was sick and tired of me, etc.
[00:16:17] AlenaBrolxFlami: gee, I could have told her the same thing, but I still respected the fact that it was her house.... then she said that I was a taker, and only USED people, and wondered if I treated my FRIENDS like that. (of course not, since they aren't like HER!)
[00:16:58] shaydexx: bloody hell
[00:17:11] AlenaBrolxFlami: so I said that I didn't have to stand around and listen to it... "THEN GET OUT - I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN - GIVE ME BACK THE KEYS! SERIOUSLY! NEVER COME OVER AGAIN!"
[00:17:21] AlenaBrolxFlami: gladly, BITCH - just never email me again, either
[00:17:46] shaydexx: holy fuck... I guess now she'll finally leave you alone, hopefully
[00:17:54] AlenaBrolxFlami: hopefully!
[00:17:55] shaydexx: but man, how immature
[00:18:37] shaydexx: I really hope she will... you've put up with enough!
[00:19:16] AlenaBrolxFlami: yeah... in case you're wondering where the pushing came into play... that was when I said I wasn't going to finish the sink of dishes (I had done some up to that point) - and then she tried to turn me back toward the kitchen, and hit me.... okay, lady, all bets are off, mother or not
[00:19:37] shaydexx: no kidding
[00:20:10] AlenaBrolxFlami: I'm a big believer in respect for a person's space... and I would never hit someone first unless they provoked me / hit ME first
[00:20:21] shaydexx: same
[00:20:53] AlenaBrolxFlami: verbal stuff... yeah, okay... not saying that's OKAY okay, but physical stuff is different
[00:21:11] shaydexx: oh yes
[00:22:09] AlenaBrolxFlami: now, if she'd just left me alone - sure, I might have done the dishes.... or if she didn't just expect me to do two-thirds of the dishes with the lie that it was really one-third.... I'm not totally blind! I can SEE that it's more than a third
[00:22:24] shaydexx: yeah
[00:22:43] AlenaBrolxFlami: if she had told me in a nice enough tone of voice to do that amount of dishes, I might have grumbled a bit, but I'd have done them
[00:23:06] shaydexx: mhm, for sure
[00:23:19] AlenaBrolxFlami: seriously... my glasses flew off my face!
[00:23:27] shaydexx: wow
[00:24:00] AlenaBrolxFlami: I'm not saying I'm PROUD that I hit her back (she has a height advantage and such), but that doesn't mean I won't defend myself - I'm 33, not 6 :P
[00:24:14] shaydexx: yeah :P
[00:24:35] AlenaBrolxFlami: not saying that six-year-olds WON'T defend themselves or their loved ones, but you know what I mean
[00:24:43] shaydexx: oh, of course
[00:27:41] AlenaBrolxFlami: my brother and sister advised me to do the rest of the dishes, but I wasn't in the mood :P
[00:27:50] shaydexx: :P
[00:28:22] AlenaBrolxFlami: then right before I left, I heard my mom playing the victim to her daughter-in-law, as in "you don't know how RUDE she is to us, Harmony!"
[00:28:34] shaydexx: HAH!
[00:28:37] AlenaBrolxFlami: I KNOW!
[00:29:17] AlenaBrolxFlami: I was thinking "this probably wouldn't have started if you hadn't insulted my intelligence in the first place!"
[00:29:27] shaydexx: yeah!
[00:30:05] AlenaBrolxFlami: privately thinking something is ONE thing... but saying it to the person? HA
[00:30:13] shaydexx: yeah :P
[00:31:53] AlenaBrolxFlami: and yeah, I could have said stuff to her as well while she was ranting about not feeling appreciated and suchlike, but she had access to stuff which could have been weapons (dishes, etc.) [so did I, but I never attack first unless it's online gaming]
[00:32:08] shaydexx: yeah
[00:33:26] AlenaBrolxFlami: she thinks I only went to Chinese New Year dinner yesterday because there would be no dishes... no, it was because I wanted to spend a dinner with Grandma since the holiday is so important to her
[00:33:40] AlenaBrolxFlami: and even if I told her that, she still would persist in her wrong thinking
[00:33:40] shaydexx: mhm
[00:35:15] AlenaBrolxFlami: I was going to ask Ivan or Eric for regular Sunday rides after the Olympics anyway (not because I'm too old to be riding to church with my parents), but it'll just have to be this week (the traffic doesn't seem TERRIBLE at 9:15 AM)
[00:37:09] shaydexx: yeah
[00:40:07] AlenaBrolxFlami: I'd say that violence doesn't get you results - but of course she's always been an abusive person
[00:40:28] shaydexx: ahh
[00:41:19] AlenaBrolxFlami: and this is why I will never be a mother myself - I'm afraid of fucking up the kid for life
[00:41:30] shaydexx: wise choice
[00:41:59] AlenaBrolxFlami: so what my mom won't know is that she only has one hope of grandkids
[00:42:47] shaydexx: hahaha, yeah :P
[00:46:17] AlenaBrolxFlami: while she was ranting, she wondered why I couldn't be polite, because then we could have a "nice normal relationship"...
[00:46:28] shaydexx: pshhh
[00:46:34] AlenaBrolxFlami: HA, I KNOW!
[00:47:15] AlenaBrolxFlami: I was all ready to be like "To tell you the truth, while I agree that being polite (especially to your parents) is a good thing, I don't think that will solve all the problems we seem to have"
[00:47:29] shaydexx: yeah haha
[00:48:17] AlenaBrolxFlami: seriously - I don't believe in being RUDE to anyone (unless perhaps I'm having a bad day and do it unconsciously), but...
[00:48:41] shaydexx: yeah
[00:49:24] AlenaBrolxFlami: I even felt bad that I didn't say bye to your mom last time I was over!
[00:49:37] shaydexx: awww yeah
[00:50:10] AlenaBrolxFlami: but then I was like "okay, she's not likely to take it REALLY PERSONALLY and bring it up the next time I stay over"
[00:50:21] shaydexx: oh, of course not
[00:50:27] shaydexx: she figured you had to take your bus
[00:50:46] AlenaBrolxFlami: and that is what a normal person would be like
[00:50:52] shaydexx: yup
[00:52:01] AlenaBrolxFlami: now, I can understand that maybe my mom felt under-appreciated and such, and I'm not saying that forgetting to say thanks is the best thing ever or anything, but at the same time, you don't belittle people's intelligence and then literally push them around when they won't do things according to "plan"
[00:52:22] shaydexx: yeah definitely
[00:53:29] AlenaBrolxFlami: sure, as soon as I said that I didn't have to listen to what she was saying (which I'm SURE she took to mean "I don't have to listen to ANYTHING you say about ANY subject EVER!"), I expected to get booted out of the house.... but by that point, I didn't care :P
[00:53:55] shaydexx: yeah :P
[00:54:20] AlenaBrolxFlami: I can also understand saying things in the heat of the moment, but this goes too far
[00:54:27] shaydexx: for sure
The 407 came in a matter of minutes, and I separated all the gifts into bags when I got home. I also put the rice in the storage container... man, that's really heavy now, but it surprisingly ALL FIT! While I was watching JACK BAUER, Harmony called (my phone was on?!) and wanted to know if I wanted to go to the Kathleen Edwards concert at the O Zone. Since I was up for distraction, I went. (I put laundry in the washing machine before I left, and now it's on Round #3 in the dryer...)
Even if it was raining, it was good stuff - not familiar with her work, but it sounded pretty cool. I ignored Jon and Harmony as they practiced swing dancing, haha. Grandma had seemed amused by that, heh. Yay for distraction! We attempted to check out Heineken House later, but it was apparently closed despite two lineups - maybe tomorrow during the day! Noticed that my socks had holes in them, and that my shoes seemed to be on the verge of falling apart - I had taken note of that on Saturday night, but didn't think too much of it then. Now, I think I'll get new ones on Wednesday! (best not to have wet feet and stuff when stepping in puddles and mud)
Labels: 2010, alcoholic drinks, amusement, annoyances, billie, bookmarks, crap, david, dinners, dragons, evelyn, food, grandma, japan, maxed-out tags limit, mom, music, shopping, sports, steph
