Westwood Plateau, Susanna, police stops

Managed to import my entire journal to Dreamwidth, so that's where I'll be posting from. I CANNOT DEAL WITH THE NEW LJ UPDATE PAGE OR THE BLOGGER PAGE! I'll mirror posts, of course. At 5:30, we were off for the long journey to Westwood Plateau in Coquitlam through Port Moody! It ended up being near Billie's! We had to pick Jon up at Tom Lee first. Mom missed the sign, so we had to take a scenic detour around Yaohan before meeting Jon. Then we went to Jon and Harmony's, where Steph was holding baby Ayler while Harmony got ready. He grabbed my finger, which I still think is cute! I kinda failed at holding him, but managed to sit him up in my lap so he could see what was going on since he loves that. When it was time to go, I elected to ride in Jon and Harmony's car. The baby was fussy for all but fifteen minutes of the LONG ride to Coquitlam, but they figured that it would be okay as long as he got SOME sleep. Of course, it was pretty loud at the banquet, too. Sat with Peter's family and some other people, which was fine. Saw Aaron at the DJ booth, which was cool. They had a lot of food (CHEESECAKE!), white wine, entertaining games, and COFFEE! Got home at 11 after an eventful car ride that involved taking 25 minutes to get to Lougheed Highway from Westwood Plateau, filling up the car since the "FILL UP" light came on, and being stopped by the police since Mom was driving with her lights off after the trip to the gas station. In fact, Mom was so stressed when the police car wanted to stop her... she drove right into the sidewalk when stopping in the lane across the street from the apartment complex where I live. Shortly after I got home, Eric M. got on MSN to ask whether I was going to church tomorrow... I was half NOT going to go anyway because I'd had too much religion (I know - religious ceremony) AND because Mom hoped to see me. Then he said that he had meetings afterwards (I could deal with his being there early) if that impacted my decision, which needed to be made SOON as he was going to bed. Okay, then I'm definitely NOT going!

Poutine, Lindt chocolate, pub glasses, and Grandma

So much for not going out till Thursday - my laundry detergent cup is ruined after doing some laundry, so I had to get another one. Thank goodness I can shop on my OWN schedule! Found some pub glasses at London Drugs which were $1.20 each, so I bought four of them... good to have spares around, just in case! Also bought a 300g on-sale Lindt dark chocolate bar (the sale expires tomorrow), and some Ruffles sour cream and bacon chips. Then I went home to put it away before going out again for A&W poutine at the Richmond Centre food court - Troy Anthony is to blame for this, since he was posting pictures of said dish in Puckheads! Since I was out anyway, I decided to go see Grandma at Dogwood - I knew my mom would make a big deal out of my not coming today. I didn't go last Tuesday (but I went the next day!), and to hear her go on about it, it's like I never visited Grandma last week. *rage* When my parents offered to let me tag along for baby-minding, I said no. Then when my mom said I should call her if I needed a ride to the long-term care home tomorrow, I said I probably wouldn't be coming out. YAY FOR "ME" time, until the weekend anyway! They gave me some white nectarines for Uncle Michael and Aunt Leslie, plus measuring tape to size out Grandma's feet / shoes before they left.

Grandma thought I was Steph AGAIN, and wanted me to eat food there; no thanks! Uncle Michael offered me two throat lozenges and a banana, which I took. We talked about transit, Aaron coming in November, their not coming to Sunday's dinner since they needed to pack, the long days involved in driving from Burnaby to Dogwood and back again, China, cruising, the Blue Jays-Mariners game, a monkey in a classic movie, and more. It was nice to actually talk to him, heh. When I decided to leave at 6 after Grandma had finished her dinner, I had JUST missed the Cambie bus! On the way home, two stupid bicyclists didn't see me and almost ran me over! FUCK!

Psycho hosebeast / Chinese Eric planning! / RED ROBINS

I decided to call Chinese Eric at about 6:50, and he'd just got in; we had a great 45-minute conversation, though! As I thought, he HAD called me a few nights ago at 11 PM, but he just wanted to see if I'd bumped into Nathan again since that guy doesn't respond to messages. Nope, I hadn't seen him! White Eric's pizza crawl idea might have been good last week if I weren't feeling terribly! After telling him about the resident who THREW FOOD AT and SPIT AT different care aides today, I updated him on James... so HE says that his ex-girlfriend Little Miss Giggles was basically a psycho hosebeast who was possessive and jealous. She was telling him that she loved him within two weeks, was talking about moving in and having children, and was basically bad news. SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE SELFISH?! Needless to say, he didn't have a very warm welcome from me last night when he told me that he was back online. ("Do I know you? Oh... it's YOU.") Eric concurred with me: BAD NEWS!

We talked about hockey, CFL football (the Lions won today), early birthday wishes for the weekend, cold and windy Hong Kong winters, Havarti, guys exposing themselves, his guy perspective ("they're not running towards you - flasher with trenchcoat!"), lockout talks, TLC reality shows, JERSEY SHORE not being like the SOPRANOS (Mafia!), MSN possibly dying like ICQ did, poker, the blackout on local football games, and birthday dinner details. It'll be the first time he'll be at Kwong Chow without his family, hahaha. Aaron C. suggested Chuck E. Cheese or the River Rock casino, but one's too far and the other's too expensive! Eric's down for two dinners in two days, so Red Robin's is ON! Not that I have to run my own birthday celebrations by him, but if I want him at both (and if he doesn't mind), it's only considerate to take your best friend's opinion and preferences into account! So it's Red Robin's - no Chinese food twice in two days for ME if I can help it, haha. Made a FB event for it, too. Replied to Mandy's emails afterwards, too. :D

Copa Café, Uncle Michael, Aunt Leslie, and DRACULA

Mom and Dad were late picking me up, but we were on our way to Dogwood pretty soon. Apparently, the Terry Fox run is next week, so I should tell white Eric in case I ever decide to go to church. Mom thinks I should, but we'll see - I can make my own decisions. After feeding Grandma some chicken congee and special tea, Mom found out that Uncle Michael and Aunt Leslie had gotten lost! Grandma seemed to have a good appetite, anyway. Of COURSE Mom made me sit in the middle... sigh. Turns out we went to Copa Café for lunch, and Mom was surprised that I'd been there before! I let Aunt Leslie hold hands with me while walking to the restaurant... Mom let me order a mango bubble tea since it was only $2 with a meal (normally $4.50), haha.

They talked in Chinese about what to do around here, Kin's Farm, Yvonne, Lillian, Aaron, Auntie Kwai, Grandma's health, shoes, Wails, and more. I got a ribeye steak with Paris-style sauce; I'd have ordered a steak with black pepper sauce, but I thought Mom was getting that. She got some other noodle dish instead! Oh well. Aunt Leslie ended up being "sneaky" and paying for the meal, and also gave Mom a LAI-SEE envelope for baby Ayler: Mom was polite and said NO to everything (especially since she apparently told them that SHE'D pay for the meal), but it was already done! Got home to do some editing and posting, heh. I should call Chinese Eric soon in case I join everyone for dinner tomorrow, haha. Also decided I was done with ontd_pucking ... OFF-TOPIC STUFF RULES! thehockeypool FOREVER!


Mom, upon hearing a news story about a kiddy Transylvania movie: "What kind of name is DRACULA?! Why would you have that name?!" My explanations that Dracula is a CHARACTER in a KIDDY movie fell on deaf ears. AIYA!

Italian Tomato, outdoor mats, Douglas Park, and GOOD FOOD

I was going to visit Grandma briefly before going to meet Eric at Langara Station, but Jon said to bring a mat to sit on. Since I didn't have one, I went to the dollar store / Sears / London Drugs to see if they had anything like that. London Drugs DID, but it was more like a balcony mat - whatever, I wasn't picky at that point since I was running out of time! We went to Douglas Park to meet Jon, Harmony, and Ayler. This was after we went to Dragon Ball to pick up bubble tea. Jon paid Eric back for his order of something fruity (mango) - half sugar - coconut jelly for Harmony, and something adventurous (red bean and longan) - half sugar - pearls for himself. I didn't have cash, so Eric paid... he also got taro, and I got a pudding. Mr. Dragon Ball was still there!

Jon, Harmony, Eric, and I talked about baby Ayler, parenthood, the bright yellow color of Eric's shirt, my Canucks shirt, Grandma and her eye not being quite open, Steph, Lisa, the puppy, life updates, construction, Nathan, Desmond, and more. When Eric held the baby, Ayler started crying! Edwin and Jane showed up with baby Rebecca, and both babies started fussing and crying when they looked at each other! Talked about Brian and Amy's wedding next week, Amy finding the ring before the proposal, Norman, Sean, children's concerts (one was in the background!), and more. Eric and I left earlier than they did because of the sun and a bit of hunger. We talked about Kingspark Seafood House, but I wanted to see if we could find that Italian Tomato place which Eliza recommended to me months ago. As it turned out, we did - but not after some creative driving and turns of phrase! No, I don't mind if he swears!

Discussed Grandma, pasta, his cousins not being babies anymore, pizza, mushrooms, chicken, spicy Italian sausage, shrimp, life, chilling, Price Smart, sports, the Blue Jays, BEYOND BELIEF, curses, paying me back if I paid by debit, his friends getting married and having kids, the lockout possibility, and more. Of course I didn't mind if he stopped by Price Smart briefly to see if he could find stuff for his grandma! He didn't, but he still opted to chill for a bit back at my place. Conversed about new books, Uganda and Gay Pride, CRACKED articles, cash, Halloween and Christmas stuff in stores already, the guestbook, and more. When he left about an hour later at 10:30, Yvonne had emailed me and Jon some contact info for her and her siblings. I finally managed to reply to Steve's email, too... it's been almost three weeks, man! Things keep on happening around here!

BAD NEWS ON THE HORIZON

Went to the hospital, and saw Auntie Kwai there with Cousin Lillian, whom I hadn't seen in YEARS! She quickly told me stuff about Grandma, and then said that she'll be here for a week. Her sister Yvonne landed here tonight with her husband William and daughter Andrea (they're staying with his family in Port Coquitlam), so I might be seeing them. Jon came by later, just in time for a CT scan on Grandma. We caught up with Lillian, who says her brother Aaron is working in Korea from Hong Kong; wow! Later, we received some bad news from the doctor - MALIGNANT BRAIN TUMOR?! That might explain why Grandma's been going downhill so quickly in the last month. Jon says that a lot of people at church know where Grandma is now, and we stayed with her for a few hours more. We answered everyone's questions as best we could, translated where needed (but Grandma was still confused!), and figured that our parents not talking was less important than this. Maybe if Uncle Michael and Mom are face to face, things will be better?

Jon says that he would email Steph and Lisa when he got home (it's easier for them to change their flight!), knows that Harmony understands his not being home to help take care of the baby, and was wondering whether he should let Mom and Dad know NOW or in a few days when they get back. We figured that we shouldn't ruin the cruise, and that any biopsy surgery might be traumatic for Big G. If the life expectancy is about three months at the most, then we need to stop being in denial pretty soon. Later, we told Grandma we'd be going - Lillian gave us rides home, but she and I stopped by the Korean BBQ place across from #9 to have some Korean noodles / rice / soup to eat first. She was at the hospital all day, and she'll pick me up tomorrow too. I got home to email Eric Ho FIRST / the BS group second, and the chair broke on me as I was sitting in it! Then I got a message from Teresa L. about whether I still talk to David S. - nope!

Kwong Chow GOOSE dinner / AWESOME talking!

I had just enough time to upload pictures to Photobucket and do a bestiary entry before the parents picked me up; I'll concentrate on the messes which are my FB albums later. The Kwong Chow dinner was good; we had goose, pork belly, veggies, congee, eggplant (bleh), rice, prawns, and other things. Discussed Ayler's cute yawning, bathing the baby, Grandma, the lards going to Russia, vomiting, stress, Ayler being so hungry that he could eat his hand, the direct translation of "I'll beat you to death" (Lisa was HORRIFIED!), threatening the baby (we'll give him lots of sugar before we return him to his parents!), Aaron L. (he came by for a bit), poo / medicine (NOT abusing it), fans, chopstick skills, playing scales to calm the baby down, O CANADA, Vegas bags, leftovers, food, and more. It took some time to get Grandma to her room afterward; perhaps it's a good thing she doesn't know that her next-door neighbor died!

Got home and brushed my teeth (plus replied to Mandy's email) before calling Chinese Eric, which was awesome as usual. He said he had an interesting question to ask em, which consisted of his wondering if Saturday was a good time to FINALLY hang out! It was a good coincidence that I called him since he was going to message me, haha. Of course, I told him that it would be a pretty good time to do a LOT of catching up, especially if he has relatives and people coming into town for the summer. He definitely wants to get a hangout tentatively scheduled before that happens! It seems both of us were looking up how long it's been since we last hung out, and a LOT has happened since then! We also talked about the baby, parenting, some TV show called "WHO THE FUCK DID I MARRY?", serial killers, the Green River Killer, Joey Buttafuoco, Finland / Teemu Selanne, aging NHL players, sleeping in hot weather, fans, the heat in here / Las Vegas / Russia / Saudi Arabia, NOT being sick before trips, his condition, big pharmacies, bottled water, and conspiracy theories about the cure for cancer. Discussed his hanging out with me and Nathan and others to "bridge the gap" between his five Hong Kong years and now, crazy Chinese translations, crackers, hockey, Roberto Luongo, Iron Men, Henrik Sedin, Daniel Sedin, Gordie Howe, Marty Turco, Martin Brodeur, Jonathan Toews, dumb reporter questions (the players aren't going to give you an off-the-cuff answer!), summer conditioning, and more. It was definitely a great conversation!

Dead socks, venting with Billie, and BABY DRAGON for Ayler!

HAPPY CANADA DAY! 145 YEARS OLD!


Of all the people, AUNTIE YING added me to Facebook... eep, hahaha! I'm also losing it since I thought a pair of socks on top of my DILBERT comic book was a dead animal... specifically, an animal that doesn't even exist in real life! (the Sword Rat enemy from FINAL FANTASY IV) Managed to check everything in fifteen minutes after getting up at 9:55 - YAY FOR NO CHURCH! :D

Met Billie at White Spot for our early lunch - of course, I brought some pictures of Ayler in a binder! She was late, but it was all good since I'd also brought a book to read. We discussed James, Chinese Eric, Scott, Sara, Aaron, Evan, NEEDING ALONE TIME AWAY FROM FAMILY AND OTHERS, Vegas, Jamaica, people who just DON'T GET IT when they're being assholes, communication breakdowns, her work stress, Dorna, growing apart from people, bills, the good feeling you get when you finally tell someone exactly what you think of them, forgiveness, burger cravings, burritos, North Vancouver, feelings for other people complicating things, Ken, artwork, ideas, Coke in the freezer exploding, Jeremy, Ryan, Matt, divorces, gossip, Jairus, Montreal, sex, Coquitlam, writing, ideas, and more. I told her what had happened right before Christmas with Teunis, what had happened at New Year's and a bit later with Korey and his stupid friend Amanda, plus what happened a couple weeks ago with Randal. YEAH RIGHT, I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYWAY! After that, I went into Zellers to see if they had cheap shoes - they were on sale, but I couldn't find any in my size, so left to go to Lansdowne instead. I finally found a spare pair in my size which fit, then went to the dollar store to get HUGE gift bags for the crystal plates / a stuffed red dragon for baby Ayler (I couldn't resist) / a farewell card for Auntie Rebecca. I'm normally opposed to giving out religious cards, but it works in this situation - besides, the blurb inside worked best out of the available selection for the occasion!

My MS Paint meme drawing for Matt

I just drew this picture based on Matt's interest of "more than 150 interests" ... or it could be based on his interest of "151." There wasn't enough room to write 151 made-up interests; sorry! :P




I know the writing is kinda small, so here's the list in case you can't read all the made-up interests:

Matt's interests

1. triangles
2. noodles
3. mousetraps
4. vents
5. echinacea
6. folders
7. vitamins
8. ice coolers
9. pasta
10. kettles

11. apartments
12. tinfoil
13. GWAR
14. laundry
15. ovens
16. children
17. toilets
18. uncles
19. David Crowder Band
20. Brian Doerksen

21. tools
22. hanging out
23. A&W
24. fun times
25. winning
26. booths
27. Greek food
28. free stuff
29. upgrading
30. nerds

31. information
32. sparks
33. washing machines
34. peanuts
35. chocolate
36. Kleenex
37. fortune
38. community
39. flowers
40. parties

41. waiting
42. angels
43. bugs
44. eagles
45. housewarmings
46. birthday cards
47. world records
48. settling in
49. good friends
50. burgers

51. whiteout
52. wires
53. relationships
54. fires
55. blindness
56. the universe
57. bookmarks
58. restaurants
59. acerbic wit
60. pawn shops

61. wildberries
62. new things
63. fishes
64. riddles
65. brains
66. editing
67. Greece
68. Final Fantasy
69. spells
70. directions

71. walkthroughs
72. Photoshop
73. nuances
74. moods
75. England
76. angels
77. butter
78. speakers
79. American Idol
80. cabs

81. noise
82. light
83. souvenirs
84. Salisbury Steak
85. being feisty
86. buffets
87. awareness
88. China
89. emailing
90. fur

91. the Ramones
92. mages
93. towers
94. dogs
95. chips
96. batteries
97. beds
98. rulers
99. mountains
100. blindness

101. potions
102. silver
103. antidotes
104. Dracula
105. unicorns
106. Shasta
107. libraries
108. psychology
109. growling
110. Latin

111. squid
112. soda
113. dust
114. giants
115. trials
116. arrows
117. wind
118. hammers
119. feathers
120. goblins

* and 31 more (at least)


from: glowing_dragon
to: matt1993

from: Leslie
to: Matt A. :)


more than 150 interests

OR

151

Google Maps, DRAGON WARRIOR, March 2012 BBT Tally

Harmony emailed me last night to thank me for my generous gifts of the toys, sippy cup, and baby wipes; she also thanked me for coming out to the baby shower, since she and Jane had had fun! I'm sure she can use the things I gave her, hopefully! Eric tried calling me when I was in the shower, but resorted to MSN: there's been a delay, and he figures it might be best if we cancel. If he calls me later, we're still on. Sounds good to me, and I'll definitely be thinking of him! Matt shared a funny DRAGON WARRIOR / Google Maps video with me - he isn't sure it's NOT an April Fool's joke, but it made me laugh!
<iframe width="853" height="480" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/rznYifPHxDg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>


<b>MONTHLY BUBBLE TEA TALLY, MARCH 2012 (2)</b>

lychee @ Big Orange (Thursday, Mar. 22)
banana @ Big Orange (Friday, Mar. 30)

Jalapeno bagels, vodka, bath salts, Kaitlin, Ryan, Matt, care, and laughter

Note to self: Try jalapeno bagels from Tim Horton's. INTERVENTION tonight: a dad who's an alcoholic (drinking a gallon of vodka a day) / a girl who's addicted to alcohol (drinking up to a fifth of vodka a day - she could black out), marijuana, and crystal meth / a guy who's addicted to snorting synthetic bath salts. Replied to Mandy's email before watching CSI: MIAMI. I got a caring FB wall post from Ryan, which made me smile; I also got funny FB posts from Matt A. and Kaitlin, which made me laugh. I definitely needed that! :)

Racism, derailing, NON-CANON dinosaurs, 4-1 loss

UGH, RACISM! I encountered the racist C-word on the hockey group from a European mod (who doesn't get it according to his wife), and even though it wasn't personally directed at me, I was still hurt. Someone else and I called him on it, and he basically said, "I'll just stay out of your posts since I don't know you, and I don't know why you came into my post anyway. I'll keep a close eye on you two to make sure you aren't offensive." I don't expect everyone to have the same cultural references as I do, but that's just WRONG! Someone else linked me to Derailing for Dummies - interesting, and what I needed!

Watched a disappointing 4-1 loss to the Canadiens... SIGH. Talked to Talia on AIM about losing an hour tonight: SO SAD! Thanks to Matt, I cheered up a bit from the racist fuck when seeing this dinosaur comic about non-canon stuff. :D

Feeling better, Aaron, Christine, AGM, 3-2 loss, and snow

I feel better right now about things, which is good.... but now I have nobody to talk with about stuff! UGH! Aaron C. and Christine B. wanted to add me to Facebook - oh, the Puckheads and Canucks fan pages! Taught Troy about typing out emoticons in FB messages, too. Benedict, Vania, Martin, Edmond, and others reminded me about the church AGM, which I'd forgotten about... they did have quorum, although Edmond said that he wouldn't have bothered coming back after lunch if he'd known, since he was really sleepy after eating a lot! Thanks to a REALLY late goal by Dallas, the hockey game (my priority!) went to overtime. Then the Stars scored... FUCKING 3-2 loss! Gerard said it was snowing in Vancouver, which wasn't a surprise for me.

Islanders, Lucic, LUFIA FORTRESS done, PASTA TWINS, and views!

The Canucks won 4-1 over the Islanders last night, so YAY for that! (EMPTY NETTERS! DAVID BOOTH! AARON ROME! CODY HODGSON! HENRIK SEDIN!) I also finished LUFIA AND THE FORTRESS OF DOOM - betrayal and memories, indeed! Then I heard that Milan Lucic has NO suspension for deliberately running into Ryan Miller - ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! UGH! Christine Bennett and I are going to be pasta (penne?) twins tonight, haha.

You Are Simplicity Oriented

While there is a lot of ugliness in the world, you believe that almost no one is beyond redemption. You take each day as it comes and simply try to do your best. You try not to be hard on yourself. A great communicator, you can get along with almost anyone. You are very accepting. You are simply a good person. You have high standards you uphold, but you don't boast about your morals.

The View Test

Blogthings: Free Quizzes for Everyone

Bad Baby Names, Part VII: Jesus' Mom is No Saint

Part VII: Jesus' Mom is No Saint



I have a 20-year-old son named Case Mitchell and an 18-year-old daughter named Cheyenne Autumn. my daughter has some of the most beautiful red hair in the world, so her name fits her to a tee.

Not only does she have beautiful red hair, but Cheyenne Autumn stars James Stewart and Richard Widmark, and is regarded by many critics to be John Ford's most cynical of his later Westerns. She runs 2 hours, 35 minutes and is available on VHS.

---

What I do want is a name that is unique and sounds dignified without being "laughable." What I do NOT want is a name that is so different it takes a lifetime to get used to. My mother did that to me, and I fuss with her about it to this day. (I'm almost 34) She named me Zebrena Nanzet (which is a variation of Sabrina Nanzette), which she says she found in a baby book in the late 60s. No matter how much emphasis I put on pronouncing the 'Z' in my first name, people have already started spelling Sabrina. Let me just tell you that I have been cursed with spelling my name everywhere I go. And I do mean everywhere.

We believe you. Poor thing. Having a perfectly normal middle name like Nanzette spelled so strangely.

---

What do you think of the name 'Fancy'? For a girl, of course. Naomi found an egg. It hatched into a peacock. They named it Fancy!

Some lady found a Web site. She wrote a name. They named it Insanity!

(You C&W fans out there will immediately recognize this as the name of a shack-dwelling underage hooker pimped by her own mother in the song of the same name.)

---

I love my unique name Jetti.

I border many harbors. Sometimes I'm made of rocks and protect wharfs from the tides!

I knew a couple who likes baby names that are active verbs. They named their daughter Meander, she is called Mea for short. If it would have been a boy, they liked the name Run. Another choice for a girl was Harmony.

OK. Number 1: Meander and Run aren't active verbs until they're placed with an object, as in "I meander in delirium thinking 'Run' is a good name." Number 2: I dare... I double dog dare these people to name a girl the verb form of Harmony, Harmonize. I fuckin' dare them! Then have a boy and name him Simonize. Number 3: While I'm at it, I dare them to save everyone the trouble and name Run "The Shits" instead.

---

My to-be husband has a thing for "unique" names. He likes names such as "Veto" and Enobi." I like what I call "cool" names, such as "Kiki" and "Jack." We were having dissagrements with baby names till I smacked him upside the head and phrohibid him from naming my children.

Well, I phrohibid you from having kids at all.

Although, it is nice to know who originated the slang use of "cool" - it's this lady! ("They're what I like to call --big finger quotes-- COOL names.") And now we know she's prone to violence against her fiancé for wanting to name kids Veto so they can star in Schoolhouse Rock segments about the three branches of government!

Help me, Kobi-Wan Enobi, you're our only hope!

---

I named my little girl Tenlee simply because my husband and I liked it. It is pronounced just like it sounds. I hope she loves her name as much as we do.

Yes, she'll love sounding like a teabag.

"It is pronounced just like it sounds." If it weren't, Dadaism would have a new leader.

---

Here are some unusual girls names (and some weird):

1. Vadan

2. Jayken

3. Tamree

4. Cheyenne

5. Shayla

6. Luche

7. Velandra

8. Electra

Good luck to all the parents wanting the best names possible for their little Darlings.

Well, it's finally happened. I'm speechless. Utterly, utterly speechless. She coughs up (and I mean that literally) some of the dumbest names I've ever, ever seen after reading hundreds of these stupid, stupid entries. Then she ends it with that sanctimonious crap about how parents who give their kids stupid names are the ones who want the best for their kids. You know, most people put out an effort to find the worst possible names for their kids because they don't realize they're "little darlings." Not until Super Name Lady points it out to them.

I just.... I think I need a good cry now.

---

Can I get some thoughts on naming a girl Emerson? There's no reason behind it. I recently met someone with the name and fell in love.

Does your husband know?

I haven't decided the middle name yet - Emerson Michelle

Emerson Anne

Emerson Mae

Our last name is Kingston.

Emerson Kingston. Try saying it five times fast!

I got an email on this one from a lady who met another woman with a girl named Emerson. It went predictably.

Mom: "... blah blah blah named Emerson."

E-mailer: "That's nice, like the poet?"

Mom: (blank stare)

E-mailer: "Like Ralph Waldo Emerson?"

Mom: (blank stare. Probably accompanied by sound of crickets.) "WHO???"

Stupid public schools.

---

I feel a little bit differently. I think that if kids want to make fun of one another, they will find a way. Name your child what you feel is best, and do not worry about later on down the line. Besides, teasing is a part of life, and helps mold us to who we are. I have never heard of no one ever being teased.

Like hell! I knew a kid named No One Opielynn Amstellina Rock Fflur and he was teased like crazy!

'Til he brought that Uzi to school.

---

I'm having twins, but I want a common first name and uncommon middle name. How do these names sound?
Girls: Valerie Brigail and Juliet Alelanie
or
Boys: Santiago Joeaziel and Omar Aaron comments?

What the living hell? (How's that for a comment?) The girls' middle names are part of the Syllable Exchange Program, and the boys' names make me ponder what ethnicity this woman is, and what ethnicity she thinks her son will magically have.

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My family's tradition is to spell a normal name unusually.

OK. "U-N-U-S-U-A-L." Pronounced "Cynthia."

My name is Myndi (as opposed to Mindy), my sister is Arika (not Erica), and my brother is Ethyn, not Ethan. My boyfriend's family's tradition is two middle names. His is Tony Marc Joshua. My new baby girl's name has a lot to live up to. The final decision?

What... I get to pick? Hmm, well.... I appreciate the boy getting smacked with a random Y for a change... so how 'bout Yvytty instead of Yvette?

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My problem is I've decided on a name for my unborn son, and it's Jordan. But I have had a lot of people tell me that is a girl name. I have heard of boys named Jordan, but I don't want to give him a girl name. What should I do?

Ah ha! I always had my suspicions about that New Kid.

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My husband and I can't agree on a name. We are having a girl in August. We already have one girl named Brooke Alayna. [Really basic last name] is the last name, so we don't want a REALLY common first name. He likes Amaya Dawn or Amaya Michele. I like Mikayla or Jenna.

Amaya Dawn. Well, am I? Damn it, I asked you! Answer me!

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Are you choosing a name for your baby?
I've never met any namesakes. If you please, name your baby Onarada!

In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight! In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight! Ona-rada! Ona-rada! Ona-rada! Ona-rada! Ona-rada! Ona-rada!

(More than one reader has pointed out this is definitely a gag posting - Onarada means "fart" in Japanese. At least... I HOPE that makes it a fake entry!)

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My son's name is Gavin Orion. I'm due in September. The names we've picked out are Lyra Star for a girl, and Dante Randall for a boy. We tried to stay away from family or "too common" names. (ours are Rachel and Jason)

Dante Randall? Look, I like Clerks too, but that's just going too far. And Lyra? No child should be made out of the same material as leotards.

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Mason is my 2-year-old son's name. It is in the top 100 boys names for 2001. I think it is a strong boy's name. Why would anyone make fun of it?

Because they're opposed to his secret Masonic orders trying to overthrow the government, along with Ted Turner, the secret Catholic cultists in the Supreme Court, and the Anti-Defamation League. Duh!

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I am due in November, I just got pregnant. I am having quadruplets! Wow, that's a lot of kids. I am having four girls and one boy.

Um, there's an extra quadruplet. Are you going to auction off your least favorite or something?

The boy's name I am set on. His name will be Anthony [last name] Jr. His middle name will start with "E." My husband doesn't want it said because it's very Italian and hard for everyone to say.

I like it. Anthony That-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named [last name] Jr.

But the girls I am having trouble with. I picked out a bunch of names for firsts, but for middles, I want common, traditional names. I narrowed it down to Morgan, Arianna, Savanna(h), Sierra, Sasha, or Alyssa.

I don't know much about computer programming, but I think I can build a program to help this lady name her kids. It's called "Bunch of Letters Followed by 'ah' 2.1." Let's take it for a test-drive:


Kjlasjdah

Wifnah

Odah

RoofingNailsah

Powlwah

Platypusah

Yeah, looks good.

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I had a baby girl 3 months ago, and we named her Lauren Rebecca. (Rebecca is my husband's sister's name) However, it does not seem to fit, and we would like to change her name to Emma Lauren. But my husband does not think it would be appropriate to drop Rebecca since she was named after his sister. I don't want our daughter to have four names, Emma Lauren Rebecca [last name], and we don't want to drop Lauren, either. How do I handle this situation? Please help! I would like to change her name before she starts knowing her name!!

Holy cow.

I fully endorse this amazing insult to her child's aunt on one condition. She explains in no uncertain terms how a middle name (which has been used for millennia) can fail to fit an infant who is just barely old enough to discover she has feet and they can fit in her mouth.

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I am expecting in November. We were thinking about naming our son Kason. I've seen this name only once before, spelled Cason. I loved it then - and then realized that it was the combination of my husband's and my names. (Kay & Jason) Aside from the fact that friends / relatives may think we are crazy.... what do you think about the name Kason for a boy?

Kay and Jason. Making their kids an extension of themselves a little too much.

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It's fun to have a little story behind names for retelling later on. My son's name involves my middle name (Rae), and my daughter has a similar middle name. (Mae) We knew we were getting a son, and so his name worked out to be Graeson. Kinda neat.

The fuck? How did that "work out" when you "got" your son. Brain... hurts...

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Having been a child myself, it seems that it doesn't matter what your child is named. All children will eventually be teased for something, so what?

Wow, you were a child once? No shit! Me, I was born 19 years old, 65 inches long, and weighed 7 pounds, 1760 ounces.

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I love the Lord, am a LDS woman, and would like to name my baby baby Jesus.

Wait, she wants to call him "Baby Jesus"? How will that work after he's 33?

My husband says this is ridiculous because we are not Latino, and he does not even go to church anymore. I looked, and it is a popular name in the US, so it must be that others like me are out there spreading His love. His full name would be "Jesus Joseph Dewey." Can anyone tell me if when you are at the hospital, can you refuse to let your husband have a say in what the birth certificate says? I'm 18 years old and am a first time mom.

Issue 1: Jesus! (Praise the Lord!) Joseph! (Hallelujah!) Dewey. (..... um..... He's a duck, right?)

Issue 2: Have you ever heard anything so romantic, and yet so filled with Our Heavenly Father's purest love alighting from heaven to his children upon the earth as an 18-year-old Mormon girl wanting to have her husband barred from the hospital where she's just given birth so she can name their child Jesus. Joseph. Dewey. Amen.

Bad Baby Names, Part III: Easy to be Scarred

Part III: Easy to be Scarred




I m thinking of naming my baby Vashara Rashea.

That sounds ominously close to part of the chant to summon the demon Pazuzu!

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Brittany after the statue - Brittania

'Cause nothing in, say, France is called Brittany. Nothing big like a province. Nothing else in England called Britannia, either. Nothing big like... England.

Their hatred of this particular woman is the only thing England and France have agreed on since 1066.

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We like the name Loudon for a boy - Loudon Phillips (although we don't have a middle name yet). I can't decide if this is too different. I think it's "cool" as it reminds me particularly of a drummer or some type of musician.

Um..... yeah. Hope they don't mind being called London or Loudy until their untimely spontaneous combustion / vomit-choking / freak gardening accident.

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What does everyone think of Atticus Charles? Girl's name, Aubriana Kai. Older sister is Cassandra Jane, deceased older brother was David Thomas.

I think he'd grow up to shoot a mad dog in the street in a moment revealing the barbarity of even the most civilized in society.

Aubriana would grow up to shoot lasers from her fingers and join the X-Men.

Either way, they're set for life what with their late brother's popular fast food chain.

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I have two boys and a baby on the way... I am hoping it is a girl. My boys are Skyler Wayne and Austin Edward. I don't even know where to start with a girl. If it is a boy, I like the name Dalton.

He'll have a wonderful childhood as his brothers attract all the abuse. He can grow up to be a retail book seller!

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Hi! My name is Kasandra! It is the best name in the world! You all should name your baby girls that! I am a Greek goddess! I see the future, but no one listens to me!

---Kasandra

I'm sorry, did you say something?

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I grew up with a "grown-up" name (Victoria) and a "kid" name (Tori), as did my sister. I have always liked having both available.... so we plan on naming our firstborn son Creighton.

At last! A breath of logic! When he's little, he can be called.... Crate of Shit. Or One-Ton Creighton. Or Mr. Defies the I before E rule. And when he's older, you won't know what he's called, 'cause you won't be on speaking terms.

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What about Bubba for a boy? A great unusual name!

Since when did your Ozark shack get Internet access? Or electricity, for that matter?

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I am 7 months pregnant, and I am having a boy. I think I'm going to name my son Kakinston. What do you think... ??

Besides sounding like a former Central Asian Soviet republic bordering Uzbekistan, it aids small bullies immensely starting the kid's name with KACK.

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I like the unique names like....
For a boy: Ezra or Solomon (from the Bible)

But my husband hates Ezra! I really like Ezra. It is so strong and manly!

I don't know. I'm sure you can find a name better than Ezra. (Zing!)

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I have an unusual name (Sharmari), and I hated it as a child. As I grew older, I appreciated it for what it was... the first gift my mother had given me....

Wait, wasn't that LIFE ITSELF?

And I still haven't met anyone with the same name-Sharmari, pronounced SHAR-Marie.

Sharmari, where the Sharmy keepsh itsh weaponsh.

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My husband wants to name our baby Arnold because that's his first name. I can't stand the name! Any way to talk him out of it, or any ideas on nicknames besides Arnie?

Hmm... another woman with a closet hatred of her husband... I'm starting to wonder if it's hormones that trigger biological clock-ticking or PCP.

And nicknames for Arnold besides Arnie... Um... yeah.

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I want to name my child December Lynn. I love the name December, but my husband thinks that it isn't a good name because it is also a month...!

Is it? Since when?

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I just found out that I am expecting a baby girl! While I have a boy's name picked out (Guillermo junior, after his daddy... for backup, lol, cause those doctors arent always right!) I'm debating between a few girl's names. Tell me what you think.

Lorelei Jakarta (yes, I know it's an Indonesian city, but I think it's exotic)

Beyonce Noelle

Heaven Starr

Yes. Exotic. As exotic as martial law. Meanwhile, in your madness, you've gone and concocted one of the best Playmate names ever.

You know, we never would have known the origin of Guillermo Jr. if she hadn't explained - IT'S AFTER HIS FATHER. HIS FATHER!!!!! It's so funny, I'll LOL.

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Hello everyone! I'm 15 weeks pregnant, and I know I have a lot of time to think on a name. However, the father of the baby is no longer around. I have two older sons whose names are Aaron James, and Andrew Michael... no, I didn't have one thought at the time that they both started with "A's." But since so many think so, I would like to name this next child with an "A" name. I have found Alyssa, Alexia, Alea, Abigail that I like. Last input from father of baby was "going to break the cycle of the "A" name thing?" .... Ugh! Men! What do you think, any good advice for me?

Would like something not so common. Help!

Ugh! Men! Obviously the thing you should be most annoyed with right now is that he thinks you shouldn't give it a theme name because people make mistaken assumptions about the process by which you named the other kids! Not that that's the last thing he said before skipping out on your pregnant ass. No, that's not so bad. But Ugh! Men!

Update! Reader Timothy puts a nice fine point on it: "Though Alexia sounds like a pretty name for a girl, Alexia is actually an inability to read, caused by brain damage."

So maybe she should consider another A name. Something pretty. Like Amnesia.

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I think it's good to name your baby a name different from anyone else baby, because there is so many people who have the same name your baby have or it's very difficult. Also, it's hard to name your baby a different name, because when you think that no-one have that name there will be someone who have the same name your baby have when think you have named your baby different. so, you really can't have any name that's different from anyone unless it's something made up.

Judging from this entry, I think this person named their child "Have."

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Also like these, but probably won't use:

Kylah Elizabeth, Kaylee Madicyn, Kelsee Myriah

How 'bout Kaylee Madi-SIN, so she can become a featured stripper at the Lusty Lady?

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Owen James

Wyatt James

Mason James

Wanted dead or alive for robbery of Wells Fargo stagecoach!

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Well, I have no kids yet, but my choice of names are:

Charlie-Love (girl)

Javan-Taylor (boy)

Colby-Donal (boy)

Morgan-Leigh - boy or girl

That's just a few ideas... let me no wat u think?

I thnk yur on crak.

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Thazel is a name I've wanted to use for either a boy or a girl. Is that name too weird? It's a combination of my grandmothers who passed away just three weeks apart. (Thelma and Hazel)

"So where'd you get that interesting name, Thazel?"

"A string of mysterious tragedies. Now I'm haunted by two bickering old ladies from far beyond the grave."

"Oh, that's nice."

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We have a 4 year old girl named Luna, and I'm 8 months pregnant now from a boy.

(I should think so!)

We were thinking about:
Lucca (He lives on the second floor.)

Matteo

Milan

Mathio

Keanu (Duuuuuude!)

Could someone suggest us some other special names for a boy, please...

Sure! Triste! Firenze! Roma! Venezia! Vespa! Con Carne! Bicicletta! Amontillado! Vente-uno! Coloseo! Proscutto! Cavalleria Rusticana! Parmagiana! Ponte Veccio! Stronzo! Espresso! Dean Martin!

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I named my first daughter Odessa and my second daughter Blaze, and I have gotten wonderful comments from parents at school and work.

Could it be because all the parents at school and work are ALSO Louisiana strippers?

Odessa. Nothing like a kindergartener named after a deeply impoverished Ukrainian town sniffing distance from Chernobyl and home to one of the worst pogroms of the Holocaust. How 'bout Dachau if it's a boy?

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My father-in-law has talked me into naming my new baby boy "Ovie Cecil [last name] IV." I really don't care for the name, but I'm willing to name him that if I have a good nickname. I need help!!

Don't worry. You never could have seen it coming when you married Ovie Cecil III.

He can always grow up to be an off-Broadway theater award!

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It seems to me that the name "Scatman" is a great one. you know: after semi-singer and comedian Scatman Crothers.

I keep envisioning having a son named Scatman. I can imagine everyone he meets saying, 'What a cool name.' Which is good, because that way they'll have something to like about him even if his personality is really off-putting. Or if he's shallow or a bully when he's like 13, when he should be getting into punk rock or something. At least they'll think he has a hip name.

But don't use it, because I thought of it.

Damn! But your arguments are so compelling! If he grows up to be an asshole, people will still like him. And if he's a meek nerd, no one will POSSIBLY find something mean to call him as his name is already a toilet insult.

And then Jack Nicholson will hit him in the chest with an axe.

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I really like Freddie Prinze Jr., and heard his father was famous and died tragically. What was his name?

His name was Scatman.

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... and finally:

My last name is Tinkletop. For some reason, my wife objects to naming our son Timothy - Timmy for short. I think it's a good, memorable name.

You're right.

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Metrotown Sui Sha Ya with Billie - at least she's not a Viking!

I turned out to be REALLY EARLY at the Metrotown Superstore, but I luckily had a book to read while I waited for Billie. When she did get there, we went for lunch at Sui Sha Ya after I returned her philosophy textbook: discussed venting, a date she had last night with a guy named Evan whom she met at Subway, needing downtime in a relationship (her ex Jairus never understood that), Aaron's surprise going-away party today (he's going to Montreal for school), Scott and Sara being too lovey-dovey, Sean not being seen lately because of Patricia, Patrick and jobs, someone being pissed off because of a move, Fuji, Steph / Lisa, and Teunis. We also talked about Pet Habitat, guinea pigs, GREEN LANTERN, closure, writing, not abusing "anytime" privileges, Aaron's being too blunt / direct, Dave Wong, sushi / ramen / teriyaki / rolls, the postal strike and her expected heavy packages with winter wear, her going to Austria for winter (maybe moving to Europe), grandmas, BBQ salmon heads, a Ducati motorcycle, her parents, Austin / Rodrigo, Coke, and more. Then we read various books at Chapters before I took the last 430 into Richmond, and she checked out Lenscrafters. I got home to discover Teunis still wants to dress up as a Viking, and even used "Vik'd" to mean "stolen / jacked." *sigh* That man will never be normal... *double sigh*

YAY FOR JAMES! / Chapters promotion for team gear / Sugar rushes

James unexpectedly buzzed me on YM last night after that brutal game, so of course I talked to him about personal stuff at first - YAY! (plus venting, Vancouver, chewing, Rush in Austin, awesome stuff, family, and more) This morning, Teunis said that he's officially got the new job - NICE! Since Chapters IS honoring the Canucks gear promotion (I called them to make sure), I'm going there later today! (and FOUR GAMES for Rome?! REALLY?!) Lisa also graduates today, so WOOHOO!

You Are Sweet Because You're Fun

You are inventive, creative, and completely ingenious. You are extremely gifted. You're not just a thinker... you're also a doer. You can put almost any idea into action. You make lots of discoveries. You are intensely curious and always exploring. You are understanding and perceptive. You get where others are coming from, even if you don't agree.

The Sugar Rush Test

Blogthings: Waste Time at Work!

UGLY 8-1 losses... but yay for Jessie, Carmen, and Robin's gypsy tunes!

Jessie and Carmen added me to Facebook, which is cool. (but Winnie Pang UNFRIENDED me, which is NOT COOL!) Talked to Robin about stuff, which is always nice. Vanessa says she may not have to go to Metrotown, since she found some cute red shoes - interesting! Teunis and I talked about commercials, gambling, sacrilegiousness, penalties, game misconducts, fines, Brandi, the hockey game, Aaron Rome's clean hit on Nathan Horton (sending him to the hospital), going walkabout, lotion, perfume, work, Jasmine / noise, plans for tomorrow, and more. The game was filled with Boston goals, a few in the last seven minutes... 8-1?!

Robin shared this catchy cabaret tune about gypsies, which is going to be stuck in his head for days - NICE!

Free toothpaste, cavities, MARIO stuff, unfriendings, Kool-Aid, and landmarks 12th

The dentist appointment was fairly uneventful, but Sean did say I need to floss more. At least I got a coupon for free Colgate Pro-Health toothpaste, even if I do have to go back in a couple of weeks (on my parents' anniversary!) to fill some cavities while it's covered under MSP! The Oakridge Safeway sold the toothpaste in 85mL tubes for $3.99, so I was determined to find it for cheaper elsewhere, especially since there was a dollar value limit on the coupon. Found a 170mL tube for sale already at Shoppers Drug Mart; $2.99 was within the coupon restrictions, so I got that along with floss for tight teeth. Went home and discussed floss, brother Matthew, cologne, perfume, hairspray, hand sanitizer, benzene, sensitivities, family, toy helicopters, paying bills, Shaw, mysteries, THOR the movie, Kaili, pop, and more with Teunis before he went out for dinner and such.

Found that the FFII walkthroughs weren't good for editing work, as I looked at the story too much - story IS good, of course. Wasn't surprised to read that Teunis had the FINAL FANTASY games in actual game format, hahaha. Aaron S. unfriended me on FB, but that's okay - he and I didn't interact much. With his recent breakup with Billie... yeah, that complicated things no matter IF they're still "best buds" or whatever! (just found out that William unfriended me, too - wonder what's up with that, hahaha)

Someone masquerading as the Kool-Aid Man buzzed me on FB chat, haha. When Teunis got home last night, we discussed many things: server maintenance, plugs, videos, name mispronunciations, RYU / MOIRA / HERMIONE, Mormon missionaries, cats, goats, Weird Al, cinnamon oil BURNING skin, and more prior to my going to bed.