Screaming back won't help in conflict...

These tips are from The Husband Book: A Guy's Guide To Marriage by Harry Harrison Junior, which I plan to give to my brother for his wedding.

Arguments

Remember, love is work.

But love is also kind.

Don't expect your marriage to be conflict-free.

Before the fight escalates into World War Three, ask yourself: How important is it?

Practice patience with her moods, her fears, her worries. They're not going anywhere.

Don't bring up ancient history. It's never once ended a fight.

Make sure she hears exactly what you're saying. Have her repeat your words. It will amaze you what she's heard.

When she's truly furious, realize you can't win. Surrender.

Don't pout. Not manly.

Generally speaking, if you agree with her, fights can be averted.

Forgive her. Even if it's the last thing you want to do. Especially if you don't think she deserves it.

Accept the fact women argue differently than men. She'll threaten to leave. She'll say truly insane things. It's her right as a woman.

Remember that if you think it just might be your fault, it probably is.

Screaming back won't help.

If you ever feel like pushing or hitting her, seek immediate counselling.

Realize that there will be days when her hormones will be in control of her mind. Love her anyway.

Remember that if you don't say anything mean, that's one less thing you'll have to apologize for.

When conflicts do arise, ask yourself: "Would you rather be right or happy?" People who would rather be right end up in divorce court.

Learn to ask for forgiveness and mean it. She may make you say it all day and night, but eventually she will forgive.

Remember that while men just want to solve a problem, women want to talk about how it makes them feel. While this may set your teeth on edge, your job is to sit and listen.

Pray together at night, even when you're mad. This keeps priorities straight.

Don't bring up the past. In fact, a short memory is a good thing here.

Learn to accept her apologies, even if you think she could have done better.

Don't take to heart anything she says during an argument.

Practice saying the words "I'm sorry" and "I forgive you." These phrases tend to paralyze the lips of most men.

Learn you don't have to win.

Don't use words to harm.

Just because she's hostile doesn't mean you have to be.

Don't try to control her friends, moods, spending, or happiness.

Concentrate on your issues, and you'll both be happier.

Practice kindness, patience, and gentleness all the time.

Realize she has an emotional need for affection - not to be confused with hopping into bed - and if you meet this, a lot of fights can be avoided.

Remember these words: "You could be right."