Monday, June 01, 2009

You can still have breakfast with her on Saturdays!

These tips are from The Husband Book: A Guy's Guide To Marriage by Harry Harrison Junior, which I plan to give to my brother for his wedding.

Your Work

Don't make work your life. Some of the most successful businessmen are some of the most unhappily married men.

You don't have to go to bars after work with the boys. Go home.

You don't have to carry the pressures of your work all by yourself. Talk to her. Let her know what's going on.

Don't regard your work as some inner sanctum where you can't take care of family business.

Invite her to your office.

Remember, she loves you fiercely. If she perceives you're being taken advantage of at work, she'll be looking in the Yellow Pages for a hitman.

If she's a stay-at-home mom, never throw it in her face that you have a job and she doesn't. She has a job. She just doesn't get paid.

Make sure she can reach you at any time.

Carry your cell phone. Answer her calls.

If you come home from the office mad, remember who you're mad at. And it's not her.

Even if you have to work on Saturdays, you can still have breakfast with her.

Be sure your priorities are in order: God, family, work.

If she's not a risk taker, starting your own company may scare her to death. There's nothing you can do - ten years later, when you're very successful, she'll still be afraid.

In fact, she may think of "self-employment" as another word for "unemployed."

Stability is extremely important to her. If you go six months without making money, then suddenly make a hundred thousand dollars, she'll just remember the six months without money.

Hire her to keep your company's books.

Make sure she understand this isn't your company, but the family's business. She'll be more accepting of business cycles if she feels some ownership.

If you work together, take some time to mess around and have fun.

Enjoy the fruits of your success. With her.


Her Work

Don't be afraid or jealous of her success.

Marvel at her capabilities.

Be her fan.

Realize what she most wants from you is support.

Send flowers to her office.

When she rants and raves about work, just listen to her. She doesn't want your help; she wants you to listen.

Don't leave all the housework to her. She's as tired as you are.

Celebrate her achievements.

Let her know that what she's doing is important to you.

Don't compare salaries.

Fill her car up with gas on Sunday night.

Encourage her to get massages.

Have her boss over for dinner. Be on your best behavior.

She will meet a lot of people who will become very important to her. Don't trivialize these relationships.

Make sure she has an umbrella.

If she's not happy in her work, encourage her to try something else.

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